Thursday, May 04, 2006

33

Today is my birthday and it's been a busy one full of ministry--not much time for rest or celebration. (We've got a lot to do before our vacation starts on Monday.)

But I have had some time for reflection and for thankfulness. I have a LOT to be thankful for! My greatest blessing is my relationship with God through Jesus Christ. After that, I am most thankful for the beautiful (inside & out) wife that He has given me, my terrific kids, and loving church family.

I'm especially thankful this year for the expanded level of usefulness that I've experienced in gospel partnerships and pastoral friendships in the last year or so. I have recently said it this way that if pastoring is "a craft," I'm beginning to feel like a productive member of "the guild."

All praise belongs to the Chief Shepherd for all 33 years of His faithfulness to me!

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Thanks

Thank you for praying (those who did) for my prayer class paper. I was able to make significant headway today--a first draft!

Try Try Again

I'm going to try again to write my prayer class paper today. (My last few attempts just didn't happen.) I'd appreciate your prayers.

Sunday, April 30, 2006

Matt's Messages - It's Our Middle Name

“It’s Our Middle Name”
Romans 1:16
April 30, 2006

I said last week that before we start another sermon series, I wanted to take a few weeks to preach on some concerns I have for us as a church.

Last week, we talked about seeking godly counsel. I’ve noticed some hesitation among us (including me) to give and to receive godly counsel in a humble and happy way. So we talked about seeking godly counsel.

This week, I’d like to talk about sharing the Gospel.

I love it when I hear stories from you about people with whom you’ve shared the Gospel. And I’ve heard a few in the last week or so and that makes me very happy as your pastor.

But I’m concerned that you and I (and I’m including myself in this big-time!) haven’t had many stories to tell about sharing the Gospel recently.

And I want to challenge and inspire us to share the Gospel with boldness.

Because...“It’s Our Middle Name!”

Lanse EVANGELICAL Free Church.

That word evangelical is such a tongue-twister for people isn’t it?

Someone asks, “What church do you go to?”

And you say, “Lanse Free Church.” What do you leave off? The “Evangelical” part. Sometimes, I just say “the one with the playground!”

I love it when people call on the phone and they don’t know that E-word.

“Uh, hello. Is this the Lanse Evangelistic, Evangelellel, uhm Free Church?”

Yes, it is.

Evangelical means “Gospel Oriented.”

It means that we believe in and share the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

It comes from the word “Evangel” which is the Greek word for “Good News” in the New Testament.

Gospel is our “Middle Name.”

And it should be the foundation and the structure and the trim on the building of our church.

“It’s Our Middle Name.” [Whether or not we can say the big E-Word.]

But sometimes, the Gospel gets marginalized.

It can happen to a Christian church.
It can happen to a Christian family.
It can happen to a Christian individual.

The Gospel can get marginalized. Not necessarily denied, but not central like it should be.

It should be our middle name. All of us.

Matt “Gospel” Mitchell.
Blair “Gospel” Murray.
Sue “Gospel” Swisher.
Tina “Gospel” Keller. Etc, etc, etc.

This was true of the Apostle Paul. Gospel was his middle name.

And this is what he says so memorably in Romans chapter 1, verse 16.

“I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile.”

His name was Chuck. And I’ll never forget that moment.

I was a student at Moody Bible Institute. And Moody is at the heart of Chicago, a great world-class city. And cities are full of street-people. And street-people often wander onto campus wanting a handout. And one afternoon, after my classes were over, I was sitting on the Alumni Plaza, enjoying some R&R, when I was approached by a scraggly looking man who made a bee-line for me. His clothes were tattered, his hair was a mess, and I thought to myself, “Oh, no, here we go again. I hate saying ‘no’ to people.” I thought he was after some money.

But that’s not what he was after. He was after God. He said to me (I forget the exact words, something like this) “Can you tell me about God?” Now, I shouldn’t have been all that surprised; it was, after all, the campus of the Moody BIBLE Institute. But here, standing in front of me was a man who wanted to know about God. This was an open door, an opportunity to share the Gospel.

So, after exchanging names, (mine was Matt, his was Chuck) I began to explain that God created us to glorify Him in a continuous, glorious love-relationship, but that we, all of humanity, had all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. We had not obeyed God. We had not trusted God. We had not cherished God as God. And because of our sin, we are therefore alienated from God, estranged from God as enemies, separated from God.

And here was the moment—I was illustrating this story with my hands. This hand was God, and this hand was us–separated because of sin. And Chuck leaned forward and grabbed my hands. This street-person grabbed my hands! And he said, “That’s it. That’s what I feel. This is me and that is God! How do I get it like this?” And he forcibly put my hands together.

“That’s it! How do I get it like this?”

I’ll never forget that moment. Chuck wanted to know the Gospel. And I was the person in place to take the plunge. I was the evangel-ist. I was the one called to walk through the open door of opportunity. I had the privilege of telling Chuck about Christ. I got to give Chuck the Gospel.

I think that was one of the first times that I ever experienced the power of the Gospel.

Paul says, “I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile.”

Notice why Paul is not ashamed of the good news.

It’s because the gospel is power. It’s God’s power!

And it is not just raw divine power–it’s awesome divine power for a purpose.

The purpose is to save.

“I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile.”

That’s power! Anyone who believes this message experiences the power of God to save them.

It came to the Jews first, and then it came to the rest of us.

But it’s the same power for all of us.

It’s the power of salvation.

There is only one force on Earth that can save. And it’s the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

And “It’s Our Middle Name.”

Now how does that work? Look at verse 17.

“For in the gospel a righteousness from God is revealed, a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: “The righteous will live by faith.”
Those are theme verses of the Book of Romans. And they should be theme verses of our lives.

The Gospel reveals the righteousness of God [the right-standing with God] that is needed to cover our sinfulness. The Gospel tells us of Christ’s atoning death for our sins. The Gospel tells us that if we repent and believe–a righteousness that is by faith from first to last–is credited to our account.

The good news is that you and I don’t have to save anyone! We don’t have to atone for anyone’s sins. We don’t have to go to the Cross. We don’t have to be resurrected. We don’t have to save anyone including ourselves. The Gospel provides that saving power for those who believe it.

Let me give you another verse for this. 1 Corinthians 1:18, “For the message of the Cross (that’s the Gospel!) is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” (The dunamis theou.) The Gospel is powerful. It is what people need. Every person.

It’s what Chuck needed.

He said, “That’s it. That’s what I feel. This is me and that is God! How do I get it like this?”

What did Chuck need? Chuck needed the Gospel. He didn’t need me. I can’t save him. But the Gospel can when believed. Because the gospel is the message of the Cross, the word of Jesus Christ, which James says “is planted in you, which can save you” (James 1:21). The Gospel is the power of God for salvation.

And it should be our middle name.

But sometimes, it’s not. Sometimes we get ashamed of it.

We think it’s a good thing to talk about at church, but not at home.
We think it’s a good thing to tell our children, but not our co-workers.
We think it’s a good thing to think about during our “quiet-time,” but we forget it when we are out to eat.

Especially when other people are around, the gospel gets marginalized and we end up acting ashamed of it.

But Paul says, “I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes...”

This week, I tried to think of what we should be doing as individuals and as a church together to make sure that we are “not ashamed of the Gospel.”

To make sure that the Gospel remains at the center of our church and our lives.

To make sure that the Gospel is our middle name.

And I thought of three things.

#1. LOVE THE GOSPEL.

It starts by our being gospel-centered in our own lives.

Remember this? The Main Thing is to Keep the Main Thing the Main Thing. And the Main Thing is the Gospel.

The Gospel should be the central theme of, the essential message of, of first importance in our lives.

Love the Gospel.

Our leadership here from the board to the worship team has tried to make sure that our worship celebrations, for example, are centered on the Gospel.

We sing about Jesus and His sacrificial death and glorious resurrection every week. We try to keep our songs Gospel-centered to stir up love for the Gospel in all of our lives.

What do you do every week and every day to deepen your love for the Gospel?

The Gospel can be taken for granted. We need to take it deeper.

Remember that little book by C.J. Mahaney, The Cross-Centered Life?” I recommend getting that little orange book out again this week and reminding yourself of how central the Gospel is to your life. And start to follow some of his suggestions for loving the Gospel.

In chapter 6, he quotes John Stott as saying, “The cross is the blazing fire at which the flame of our love is kindled, but we have to get near enough to it for its sparks to fall on us.”

And then he suggests 5 ways to draw near to the sparks of the Cross each day.

#1. Memorize the Gospel. Take a portion of Scripture that explains the Gospel in a nutshell and go over it again and again and again and again.

#2. Pray the Gospel. Include the Gospel in all of your prayers. Thank the Lord daily for your salvation. For bringing you to Him. For giving you access to God through the Cross. Remember the Gospel in all of your prayers.

#3. Sing the Gospel. Not just here on Sundays but on Mondays in the truck.

#4. Review How the Gospel Has Changed You. Preach your testimony back to yourself and give the glory to God and His Gospel.

#5. Study the Gospel. Mahaney says, “Never be content with your current grasp of the gospel. The gospel is life-permeating, world-altering, universe-changing truth. It has more facets than any diamond. Its depths man will never exhaust" (pg. 67).

And when we do that, I think we’ll have less and less chance of it being relegated to a back room somewhere and eventually be ashamed of.

Instead, it will be center-stage and our middle name.

Love the Gospel.

It’s the power of God for your salvation!

Unless you aren’t saved yet.

Maybe all of this Gospel talk is foreign to you. Or you don’t really know if you’ve ever put your faith in this message.

Jesus died on the Cross to save sinners like you and me. He paid the just penalty for our sins. And if we put our trust in Him alone, we get His righteous.

He took our sins, and He gives us His righteousness!

That’s the Gospel. And it has the power to save you if you believe it.

To be saved, you need to put your trust in Jesus Christ as your Savior and believe His Gospel and begin to follow Him by faith.

I am not ashamed to say that this Gospel is powerful enough to save you! Today.

Believe the Gospel today.

And Love the Gospel.

#2. The second way to keep the Gospel as our middle name is to PRAY FOR THE GOSPEL.

Now, I already said to pray the Gospel. Here, I mean pray for the Gospel to bear fruit.

Paul asks for that in lots of his books.

For example, Colossians chapter 4, verse 2.

“Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains. Pray that I may proclaim it clearly, as I should.”

Paul asks that we pray for open doors.

Some of those doors will be like Chuck’s. They will open without me ever asking. He just walked up to me.

But other ones need to be prayed open.

Some of you are really good at this. Many of you have taught me a lot about how to pray for the lost.

Persistently taking unbelievers before the throne.

Our Men’s Basic Training encourages each man to pray every day for 2 other men to come to Christ.

Do you have a prayer list of Gospel-needing people that you pray for every day?

If not, what is stopping you?

This week, I ran across this amazing quote from the great 19th century preacher Charles Spurgeon. He was never at a loss for words.

I thought this was inspiring and challenging, and I have to share it with you.

“Those who are short of breath in soul winning will never be successful. If they are not saved after twenty years of prayer, follow them up to the gates of hell! If they once pass those gates, your prayers are unallowable and unavailing, but to the very verge of the infernal pit follow them with your prayers. If they will not hear you speak, they cannot prevent your praying. Do they jest at your exhortations? They cannot disturb you at your prayers. Are they far away so that you cannot reach them? Your prayers can reach them. Have they declared that they will never listen to you again, nor see your face? Never mind, God has a voice which they must hear. Speak to him, and he will make them feel. Though they now treat you despitefully, rendering evil for good, follow them with your prayers. Never let them perish for lack of your supplications.”

And he also said, “If sinners will be damned, at least let them leap to hell over our bodies. And if they will perish, let them perish with our arms about their knees, imploring them to stay. If hell must be filled, at least let it be filled in the teeth of our exertions, and let not one go there unwarned and unprayed for.”

Those are strong words but I don’t think too strong.

We need to pray for the Gospel in lost people’s lives.

And then to keep the Gospel our middle name, #3. We need to SHARE THE GOSPEL with the lost.

And here’s where I think we need the most work.

We aren’t ashamed of the Gospel when it comes to loving it or praying for it.

But when we have to get bold and share it, then it can get marginalized pretty quick.

But Paul says in Romans 1:16, “I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile.”

So, we need to share it.

Because without the Gospel no-one gets saved.

Romans 10, verse 13, “Everyone who calls upon the name of the Lord will be saved. How then, can they call on the one the have not believed in? (They can’t!) And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? (They can’t!) And how can they preach unless they are sent? (They can’t!) As it is written, “How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news! (that’s the gospel!)” We must share the gospel. That’s where the power for salvation is.

So, when was the last time you shared the Gospel?

I’ve been very convicted recently of my lack of love for the lost and my lack of boldness in sharing the Gospel with unbelievers out in the world.

Here’s some things I’m committing to do to increase my evangel-sharing. I hope that they’ll be helpful to you.

#1. I’m going to try to see people as eternal souls.

The other day I was up at the Kwik Fill getting some gas, and I had been meditating on this subject, and I noticed the guy pumping my gas and behind the counter. Like I’ve never noticed him before.

Instead of being someone to navigate, I saw him as someone who was eternal. He is going to live forever.

And I prayed for him right there and struck up a conversation. We didn’t get to the gospel this time, but I saw him and that made a big difference.

#2. I’m going to try to find opportunities to serve the lost around me.

Invite lost people over for dinner. When was the last time you opened up your home for an evangelistic get together?

I’m not sure the last time I did it. I have Christians over all the time. Christians are fun! And I love getting together for fellowship.

But we need to open up our home to unbelievers to include them in our lives.

I have a friend who tries to serve the lost in restaurants–especially servers. He says, “We’re going to pray here in a minute. Is there anything we can pray for you?” What a great conversation starter! It’s serving someone by praying for them. And you never know what might come of it.

How can we serve the lost? People think that church is out to get people’s money. And some churches probably are.

But we need to think about how we can spend our money on the lost!

#3. I’m going to try to always have a gospel tract on hand.

Or at least to have a gospel presentation memorized. But I think that a tract is a good idea. And we have a bunch of those in the foyer.

I also think (less importantly) that it would be good for us to always have an invitation to our church on hand. And we’re going to be printing up some nice ones that everybody can carry with directions to church, etc, on them.

I used to do this and always have a tract ready, but I’ve grown lazy about it, and acted as if I’m ashamed of the gospel.

Heather’s grandfather is the best at this that I know. His breast-pocket is always stuffed full with a good Gospel tract. And he leaves them everywhere and hands them out wherever he goes.

Anyone can do that!

#4. I’m going to just take the plunge and say something.

Sometimes in pieces. Sometimes we only get a chance to share a little bit of the Gospel.

Sometimes the whole thing.

I know that what they need is the Gospel. So I need to just jump in and share it.

Did you know that I have a degree in Evangelism?

I actually majored in Evangelism in College.

But I still get scared to do it.

And I’m a pastor! I’ve been in the vocational ministry for 11 years!

I’m not that scared when Chuck comes in off the street and asks.

But I’m scared when I have to talk to someone who hasn’t asked.

But what do they need? What power will save them?

Only the power of the Gospel!

“I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes...”

The professor who taught me the most about evangelism in college was named Dennis Fisher. And Dr. Fisher had a saying that he would use, “When in doubt, whip it out!” When in doubt, whip out the Gospel.

Not, when in doubt, stay silent.

When in doubt, whip it out. And share the Gospel.

Nike would say, “Just do it!”

And last but not least, (#5), I’m going to try to pray that God would give me a heart for the lost.

And I’m praying that for our church as well.

This was a Charles Spurgeon week for me. I was introduced to this quote, as well. And it has really sunk into me.

Spurgeon said, “The Holy Spirit will move them [unbelievers] by first moving you. If you can rest without their being saved, they will rest too. But if you are filled with an agony for them, if you cannot bear that they should be lost, you will soon find that they are uneasy too. I hope you will get into such a state that you will dream about ...your hearer perishing for lack of Christ, and start up at once and begin to cry, ‘O God, give me converts or I die.’ Then you will have converts.”

I realized this week that I have not been praying like that.

I have not been moved like that. And it’s probably one of the reasons why we have not had a baptism here in the last year.

I’m sorry for failing you by not praying for such a heart for the lost as that for me and for you.

I want Gospel to be our middle name here. Not just on the sign, but in how we love the Gospel of our own salvation, how we pray for the Gospel (for the lost near and far), and how we share the Gospel with those who need to hear it most.

That we would tell people how to get to God.

[I was really helped this week by a message by Jim Donahue on "How To Build an Evangelistic Church" (free .pdf of the outline at this link) from the 2005 Sovereign Grace Leadership Conference. More than anything, it was convicting! But there were a lot of thoughts in that (including the Spurgeon quotes) that made it into this message. I am in Mr. Donahue's debt.]

Friday, April 28, 2006

Whence Matt? - EFCA



Today, we're off to the Allegheny District of the EFCA for our annual conference of churches.

I've been around the EFCA now for about 15 years. When I went off to Moody Bible Institute in 1991, I began attending First Evangelical Free Church of Chicago and loved it! The expressive but God-centered worship, biblical preaching, and emphasis on relationships was wonderful. Even though I was a student and couldn't be too involved in church during the week, First Free was the first church I felt was "home" for me as an adult.

Four years later, when it was time to pick a seminary, Heather and I looked high and low and decided upon Trinity Evangelical Divinity School which is owned and operated by the EFCA. One of these days, I'll blog on my experience there.

During my seminary experience, I was a youth pastor at an independent Bible church in Zion, Illinois, half and hour north of Trinity. Beach Bible Church was then pastored by an EFCA ordained man, Randy Christie. Randy has since moved to New Mexico, but Beach Bible has been adopted into the EFCA. Someday, I'll blog on some of my experiences there, too.

When graduation from TEDS came around, Heather and I met with the district superintendents of the EFCA at a week long conference on campus. We were introduced to LeRoy Glover, the DS for the Allegheny District. He mentioned that he had 7 churches looking for pastors (out of 30!) in my old stomping grounds--Eastern Ohio and Western Pennyslvania (even my beloved Cook Forest is in the Awesome Allegheny District!). Heather and I said, "Sign us up!" And (another blog story sometime), we were called to Lanse EFC in 1998.

I really enjoy the EFCA. We have a real committment to sound doctrine, especially the inerrancy of the Bible and the centrality of the Gospel, but there is also a freedom to disagree on secondary things. And there is a lot of life and passion for Christ!

In the last year, the EFCA has begun a process of potentially revising our 12 point Statement of Faith. It's an attempt to continue to be faithful to the Scriptures, improving some perceived weaknesses in the document, strengthening our stands on evangelical doctrine, and possibly broadening our stances on a few secondary doctrines. It's been interesting to see it play out as the changes have been proposed and now discussed.

I'm generally in favor of the changes and think that they will be healthy for our movement. I'm sure that all involved would appreciate your prayers for this process. It's pretty important that we do it well. Today, during the conference, we're going to hear a presentation from our EFCA president, Bill Hamel, and our director of biblical theology, Greg Strand. I'm very interested to hear what they have to say.

Our district is now led by Superintendent Jeff Powell. He's my pastor and my kids call him, "Super Jeff!" I'm looking forward to being with him and all of our district friends today.



Part of an ongoing series about major influences on my life, thought, and ministry. "Whence" is an old English word that means, "From Where?"

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Blessings

Saturday, April 22, 2006

Matt Messages - Help!

“Help!”
April 23, 2006
Proverbs 15:22, 27:6 & 9

Since we’ve now ended our almost five month study of the Gospel of Mark, I would like to take a few weeks to preach on a couple of items which have been recently laid upon my heart for our church family.

The first item I want to take up is the Bible’s call for us to humbly seek the godly counsel of others.

I’ve noticed in my own heart and life and in the lives of many in our church family a reticence, a hesitance, and even a resistance to seeking godly counsel.

So I want to address that from the Bible and apply the Bible’s teaching on this topic to our lives.

I’ve entitled the message today, “Help!”

And let’s begin by asking God for His help. Let’s pray.

[prayer]

I will have 3 applicational points this morning. The first is this:

1. ASK FOR HELP HUMBLY.

Proverbs chapter 15, verse 22 says very simply: “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

Proverbs are general truths that explain how things work in God’s world. They are not straight promises or “case law.” They are general explanations of how God has “wired His world” so that those who learn these proverbs can successfully navigate God’s world.

And this proverb says, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

Now, the general point of this proverb is clear. Seek counsel to get success.

What kind of counsel? Well, what kind of plans?

“Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

It doesn’t say. I love how this proverb doesn’t say what kind of plans are in view.

Other similar proverbs talk clearly about military plans.

Proverbs 20:18, “Make plans by seeking advice; if you wage war, obtain guidance.”

Or the plans of a ruler or a nation.

Proverbs 11:14, “For lack of guidance a nation falls, but many advisers make victory sure.”

So, probably there are military plans in view here, but it doesn’t say that directly in Proverbs 15:22.

I think that this refers to just about any kind of plans.

“Plans [in general] fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

Do you catch what I’m trying to do by reading it to you again and again? I’m trying to get us to memorize it. Proverbs are great for memorizing.

And then for chewing on.

What kind of plans might you seek counsel on?

Military Counsel, of course.

How about Financial Counsel? Should we take out another loan? Should my wife go back to work? Should we buy that piece of ground?

How about Marital Counsel? How do we work out our conflicts? How do we increase intimacy in our marriage? How do we work out our sexual problems? How do we grow closer together spiritually?

How about Pre-Marital Counsel? How do we prepare for marriage? What do we need to be getting ready for? What’s around the corner?

Or how about Pre-Engagement Counsel? It seems like almost nobody ever seeks that out. Should we get married? Do you think we are compatible? Is this a good match?

Or how about Parenting Counsel? Do you think we’re doing the right thing with little Johnny? Do you think we are too harsh or too lenient with young Sue? How should we relate to our grown kids?

What about Vocational Counsel? Is this job a good fit for me? What should I do about my relationship with my supervisor? Am I doing the right thing with my employee here?

How about Interpersonal Counsel? Family conflict. Neighbor conflicts. What are my responsibilities in this relationship? What should I be doing?

How about just plain old Personal/Spiritual Counsel? My wife has recently counseled me that I have some glaring problems with a perceived lack of joy and humility in my life. And they sometimes get in the way of my seeming approachable as a person.

I need that kind of counsel.

“Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

Now, we’ve listed some of the kinds of plans that we might need counsel for.

Here’s a big question, “Why don’t we ask for counsel?”

Is it because we want to fail?

Why don’t we seek godly counsel on these issues?

There can be some good reasons for not seeking godly counsel.

You don’t know someone who is godly.
You don’t know someone who seems to have any expertise in a given area.
That sort of thing.

But the biggest reason we don’t is pride.

That’s why I said that point #1 is Ask for Help Humbly.

It takes humility to ask for help.

In military counsel, a general has to stoop to listen to some other person give their opinion.

In financial counsel, you have to divulge your financial situation to someone else. That gets in the way of your pride. Right?

Last year, Heather and I were struggling with a cash-flow problem that tends to show up about the same time every year. And I was struck by this and similar Bible passages that the reason I hadn’t solved our problem yet was that I had been too proud to ask for help. So I called Keith and asked if I could lay out our financial situation in front of him and have him give me some counsel.

That was hard to do! I know Keith loves me, loves the Lord, and has some expertise in that area. But it was still hard to open up my books and show him how I go about doing cash-flow.

It was helpful, though! Just doing it was helpful even if he didn’t ask me good questions and give me good advice! Which he did.

Marital Counsel. When do people go to see a marriage counselor? When it is almost too late.

Why? “We thought we’d try to work it out on our own first.”

9 times out of 10 that’s pride speaking.

More people do Pre-Marital Counseling, but that’s because it’s fun and lots of pastors require it.

Unfortunately, almost no one seeks out Pre-Engagement Counseling. Tom and Stacey, however, were a wonderful exception to that general rule and sought out advice from multiple godly counselors in their courtship stage before they decided to get married. Very wise.

“Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

It’s pride that gets in the way of Parenting Counsel, too. Who wants to possibly be told that they are doing something wrong? I don’t enjoy that myself.

What will people think if they find out that “The Pastor” doesn’t know what he’s doing with his kids?

I can get too worried about what people think and not about what is wise.

Vocational Counsel, Interpersonal Counsel, and Personal/Spiritual Counsel all suffer from the same pride problem, as well. We don’t seek out godly advice about our work, our relationships, and our character because we think we know what we’re doing.

Americans value their independence. We don’t like people telling us what to do. And we don’t like admitting weakness.

But guess what? We are weak! We all have limitations. We all have different giftings and different abilities. We are all fallen, finite creatures. We are sinners, for crying out loud!

We need help!

And not just God’s help. We need each other. That’s how God designed us. That’s why He designed this thing we call “the church!”

We need to humble ourselves and to ask for some help.

Even in areas where we are already strong, we can use help.

“Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

Now, let’s make this personal. Which of the areas I’ve gone over is an area in which you have some plans or you need to make some plans and you should seek out some godly counsel?

Maybe it’s not an area I’ve mentioned. But you know what it is.

I’d like to ask you to write it down on the back of your bulletin.

And I’d like for you to list a few people that you might ask for their advice.

Did you notice that the verse is plural?

“Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

Write down something you should be asking a godly person or three for advice on and what godly persons you might ask.

And then, pray that God would humble you to do it.

And don’t fall that false-humility that says, “Oh, I’m not worthy of their time!” That’s just pride in another dress.

“Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

Ask for help humbly.

#2. RECEIVE HELP HAPPILY.

Turn over to Proverbs chapter 27 and look at verse 6. Proverbs 27, verse 6. Pew Bible Page #652.

“Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.” (3x)

That’s a good word.

This is not always easy, but it’s good.

An enemy might look good on the outside and make you feel good by the way that they talk to you and “kiss you.”

But they are just buttering you up. They are your enemy.

But a friend might say something that hurts but they are doing so because they love you.

“Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”

So, if you have a friend, be glad and receive their help happily.

It may not always hurt! Lots of good, godly counsel isn’t a “wound!”

But even if it does hurt, be glad and receive your friend’s help happily.

This last week, I got a call from Wally Kephart on Tuesday. And he said, “Matt, are you free for breakfast on tomorrow? I’d like to get together with you. Have a few things I want to talk about with you.”

But he didn’t say what!

I said, “Sure, I think I could do that. What are we going to talk about?”

And Wally says, “Oh, I have a personal matter I want to talk to you about, and a few other leadership details we need to cover.”

Okay. I said, “Is there anything I need to do to prepare for our meeting?”

“No. It’s nothing earthshattering, don’t worry about it. See you tomorrow.”

So, of course, I did worry about it for a day or so and then we got together for breakfast on Wednesday morning. And he paid, by the way!

Wally needed to rebuke me on something I had said and how I had said it.

I had spoken rudely and bossily to a group of people the other day and possibly offended them, and Wally wanted me to know what kind of an effect my words had had.

And he was right.

It hurt to admit it. It was a wound. But it was right.

It was a faithful wound. And Wally, I am thankful that you gave it to me.

And for the gentle and loving way that you delivered it. Thank you.

“Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”

Skip down 3 verses to verse 9.

“Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of one's friend springs from his earnest counsel.”

What makes a good friend? Earnest counsel. Loving advice. Painful at times, but you know that they love you.

It’s like perfume and incense. It’s sweet and joy-giving to have a friend that cares so much that they will give you earnest counsel.

Be happy if you have godly friends that give you godly advice.

Even if it’s stuff you don’t want to hear.

Kids, this applies to you when your parents give you counsel. Be happy that they do!

Adults, this applies to you, too, whenever a godly friend, parent, pastor, elder, teacher, supervisor, roommate, whoever gives you some counsel. Be happy that they do!

Receive Help Happily.

I mentioned earlier that my wife has been telling me that I sometimes come off as depressed and proud.

Man! Not what you want to hear about yourself.

I’d rather she just gave me kisses! And told me how wonderful I am.

But would she be my best friend if she did?

“Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”

[We kiss, too, don’t worry!]

I have no one in my life more pleasant, more to be happy about than my wife.

“Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of one's friend springs from [her] earnest counsel.”

Have you received some counsel recently that you have been unhappy about?

Take some time right now to repent of that sulking and that pride and rejoice that you have a friend who would love you enough to speak into your life.

O! That our church would marked by the humility of seeking and receiving godly counsel with joy!

O, that my life would be the same.

#3 (and last). OFFER HELP LOVINGLY.

This is the flip-side of the other two.

If we are going to be seeking out godly counsel about finances, marriage, parenting, relationships, work, character, etc, we also need to be willing to offer counsel to others, as well...in love.

Are we pleasant enough as friends to give earnest counsel?

Do we love others enough to deliver a faithful wound?

Do we love others enough to speak the truth in love?

Those two things have to go together. Truth and love.

We can fall into the ditch of truth without love which is harsh and offensive and wounding without healing. And it’s not really truth without love.

Or we can fall into the ditch of love without truth which is soft and “caring” but doesn’t help the other person where they really need it. And it’s not really love if it doesn’t have truth.

We need to speak the truth in love for others.

And offer them counsel, advice, and help.

Is there someone in your life where you see a need of theirs for godly counsel?

Is there a chance that you are the one God has in mind to talk with them?

It may not be a hard discussion. It might, though.

Do you love them?

“Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of one's friend springs from his earnest counsel.”

We need to be real friends with real pleasantness.

We need to speak into others’ lives truth with love.

That’s what God did isn’t it?

God gave to us the gospel, the good news.

But the good news came, at first, with bad news.

We are sinners deserving of the wrath of God.

But Jesus Christ died on the Cross to save us from our sins and bring us to God.

Imagine if God had not told us this good news!

Imagine if God had not counseled us that we need to turn from our sins and turn to Jesus Christ as our Savior and our Lord.

If you don’t know Jesus as your Rescuer and King, you need that good news right now.

The Lord Jesus is inviting you to turn and trust in Him and what He did on the Cross for the forgiveness of your sins and for eternal life.

And all of us here who claim Jesus as our Lord are being called by Him, as well, to:

Ask for Help Humbly

“Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

And Receive Help Happily.

“Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”

And Offer Help Lovingly.

“Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of one's friend springs from his earnest counsel.”

Speaking the truth in love.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Easter Lily (and Her Happy Husband)



My beautiful bride Heather and I yesterday on Resurrection Sunday.

"Like a lily among thorns is my darling among the maidens." (Song of Songs 2:2)

Prayer Request for Prayer Paper

I'd appreciate prayer for my post-course assignment for my class on prayer. I hope to work on it from early tomorrow morning until noon.

Thanks for praying!