Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Personal Prayer Retreat - A Report

Yesterday was my personal prayer retreat (8 hours of solitary prayer) for my Theology and Ministry of Prayer Class. I was to get alone (and for the bulk of the time) read and pray through a list of assigned scriptures. This is the report I wrote for the professor:

I was able to complete this assignment on February 14, 2006. A couple from our church was on vacation and loaned me the use of their home for the day. I set myself up in their basement and got busy praying.

I confess that I was pretty apprehensive about this assignment. The last time I tried a day-long personal retreat was a for similar seminary assignment nearly ten years ago. That time was excruciating–the “inner chaos,” lack of focus, and confusion about direction made the time very painful.

This time, however, was pretty different–happily, I think I’ve grown quite a bit since then. I began at 8:30am with a half-hour of praise (I’d brought along a set of worship albums) and entreaty, asking God to open my heart to Him and bless me with a sense of His presence. At 9:00am, I began reading aloud the assigned passages in scripture, praying during and after each reading along the lines of the themes in each passage. Music was a great aid this time for me, as I sang songs that seemed appropriate for nearly every reading, as well.

At 10:30am, I was in the middle of the Psalm section, and I began to feel a little worn out and was having a hard time concentrating, so I switched formats. I began to use my church directory for intercessory prayer for my flock. Beforehand, I had asked the families in my church to write out prayer requests for each of their families for this retreat, and I took that file of prayer requests and names to the Lord. This turned out to be a terrific way of strengthening my bond with my people, as many turned in prayer requests for things I previously knew nothing about as their shepherd! It was especially encouraging to me, as well, to hear what was on the hearts of my people and to see so many of them express their prayer requests in exact phrases from some of my sermons! I was also amazed at how my prayers for those who had not turned in a request regularly centered on a few similar themes: salvation, discipleship (with connection to community), and a healthier, biblical family-life.

After an hour of this intercession, I stopped to eat something. I was beginning to feel very tired and light-headed. This stuff is hard work! So, I took 10 minutes and ate a light snack to worship music and then headed right back into the Psalms and prayer. Praying Psalm 119 was especially rich, as I noted (and tried to express in my own prayers) the relational interplay between the psalmist, God, and the Law. If people or ideas for ministry came to mind, I would jot them down quickly and then get back to praying.

At 1:10pm, I had made it all the way to the New Testament epistles. I stopped for a short break and snack again, and then decided to pray through the rest of the church directory and family prayer requests. The second half of the directory went quicker than the first. By 2:00pm, I was back into the reading and praying of assigned scripture. This also went quickly and, by 2:30pm, I had finished all of the assigned scripture and prayed about the themes in it. This was disappointing to me, because the assignment called for 6 hours of this kind of scripture-centered prayer, and my time-management hadn’t stretched it out for that long (even though I had read it all out loud).

I decided to do a prayer-walk, put on my winter hat, gloves, and coat, and went for about a mile walk. During the walk, I praised God for His “unbelievable” attributes–especially His omnipresence, omniscience, and omnipotence. It was a beautiful day, and I sensed God’s nearness.

I was surprised when I returned to the house to find out that it was only 3:15pm. I still had another hour and half to commit to prayer. This was the most difficult part of the day. While I felt great about what I had been able to accomplish in the first 6.5 hours, I felt lost with no plan for the rest. I tried conversational prayer and singing some songs, but I found it difficult to focus. So, I decided to write this report and then catch up on my daily scripture readings in hope of some more leading. I struggled greatly to focus. Then I read aloud a number of prayers from The Valley of Vision (my wife’s favorite source for aid in personal prayer). That seemed to help a good deal.

I finished my retreat at 4:30pm, and headed home to my family. Overall, I am pretty pleased with how the day went. I have never been able to focus myself for personal prayer for so long (even if I wasn’t able to stay focused the entire time), I was blessed to be able to pray all the way through our church family directory, and I had some sense that I had experienced God in worship, thanksgiving, confession of sin, and personal relationship.

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