“You Are My Friends” [Matt's Messages] ~ Matt Mitchell

“You Are My Friends”

Life in Jesus’ Name - The Gospel of John

Lanse Evangelical Free Church

August 11, 2024 :: John 15:12-17

Ready for some boggling? Want to have your mind boggled? This is mind-boggling:

In John 15, Jesus tells His disciples that they (and by extension you and I) are His friends

Jesus uses that word “friends” 3 times in these 6 verses.

He says it outright in verse 14, “You are my friends.” There’s our sermon title.

And in verse 15, He says, “I have called you friends.”

What a privilege to carry that designation! A friend of Jesus!

“‘Friendship’ was an important category in the ancient world” (Edward W. Klink III, ZECNT, pg. 657).

I’ve been reading a great book about friendship in the Bible by Rebecca McLaughlin. It’s called No Greater Love: A Biblical Vision for Friendship, and I highly recommend it. There’s a whole chapter just on this passage.

Friendship in that world was similar to and yet also kind of different from what we tend to mean when we use the word “friend” today.

It was different in that friendship didn’t always mean that the two people in the friendship relationship were considered equals. One could actually be a subordinate to the other. We don’t tend to use that word that way about most of our “friendships.” But they often did.

And we’re going to see that here. Jesus is not saying that He and His disciples are equals in everything. Share and share alike. Friend and friend alike. We are not equals with Jesus. But we are His friends.

Being a friend did mean that there was a special bond between the two people. And the word “friend” still means that to us today.

It takes a kind of love to be a friend. In fact, the Greek word translated friend is “philos,” the noun form of the Greek verb for loving something (like, for example, a sibling). “Phileo.” “Philadelphia” the supposed city of brotherly love.

A “philos” is someone you care about. Some you’re attached to. Someone you have something in common with, and you are fond of them. You have affection for them. A bond.

Peter and Macy's best friends came together yesterday be in their wedding party. Several handsome young men and radiant young ladies united together in lasting friendships. Their friends.

And Jesus says to His disciples (and by extension to you and me), “You are my friends.”

Last week, we saw that Jesus called them “the branches.” He was the True Vine, and His Father was the Gardener.

[Does that make the Father the first Branch Manager?]

Jesus said that He was the True Vine and His true disciples were the true branches whose main job was just to stay vitally connected to Him. Remain. Dwell. Abide.

You see here what happens when a so-called branch does not remain. How much fruit will this cut-off branch yield for the Gardener? None. Absolutely none.

But if a branch stays connected to the True Vine, then it will bear much fruit (as we saw in verse 5, and Jesus said in verse 8...) “This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples” (Jn. 15:8 NIVO).

And now He calls these “branches,” His friends.

This is the same occasion. This is the same night. This is just the next few verses. Jesus knows He’s soon to be arrested, soon to be tortured, soon to be mocked, soon to be killed. He’s going away to the Cross.

And before He goes, He’s telling His followers that they aren’t just followers, they are His friends.

And, here, Jesus explains some of what He means by that and gives them at least three things that they are supposed to do because of it. Three points of application this morning. Here’s the first one.

Jesus says, “You are my friends” so...

#1. LOVE LIKE IT.

Look at verse 12.

“My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.”

Jesus has been emphasizing obedience to His commands throughout the Farewell Teachings. We had a whole sermon devoted to obeying His commands when the Challenge Crew got back. Chapter 14, verse 15.

Jesus said, “If you love me [my friends], you will obey what I command.”

In verse 9, Jesus said that if we obey His commands, we will remain in His love. We’ll live in His love. Dwelling in His love. Like friends!

And here He says what His big command is, “Love each other as I have loved you.”

Jesus wants His branches to love His other branches.

“Love each other as I have loved you.”

Jesus just keeps hammering this idea, doesn’t He? He’s going to repeat it again in verse 17.

And it is His new command that He gave earlier this very evening when they were still around the table after He washed their feet. It’s our memory verse for 2024. Say it with me:

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (Jn. 13:34-35 NIVO).

Do you think He wants us to love one another?

It must not be that easy to do. It must not come naturally to us. We have to be commanded. We have to be reminded. We have to be told how important it is to our Lord that we do it. “Love each other!”

That’s important because we’re different from each other. We have different values, different personalities, different politics, different priorities, different backgrounds. These branches on Jesus’ vine can be wildly different from one another, but we all have the True Vine of Jesus in common, and so we’re supposed to love the other branches.

And He doesn’t just tell us to; He’s shown us how. Look at verse 12 again.

“Love each other as I have loved you.”

Jesus is our example of this, and there is none greater. Verse 13.

“Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.”

That’s another verse to memorize. There is no greater love than sacrificial love for someone you say you love.

It’s one thing to say you love someone. To say that they are your friend. Your “philos.” That’s a good thing to say! Even saying it is a kind of love.

But it’s a totally different love on a greater level to actually show your love by sacrificing yourself for your friend.

And it’s even greater if your friend is not your equal! If your friend is your subordinate. Like the Shepherd laying down his life for the sheep. The Shepherd is greater than the sheep! But the Good Shepherd (the Best Shepherd!), lays down his life for the sheep.

The good friend, the best friend, lays down His life even for His inferior friend. We are not equal with Jesus, and yet we are His friends. And Jesus laid down His life for us.

Jesus knows what’s coming. He knows Satan is on his way. He knows that He will be dead in less than 24 hours from asphyxiation while nailed to a post. And He’s choosing it. He’s laying down His life. Willingly.

Because He loves us. Because we are His friends.

“Greater love has no one than this...” If that doesn’t boggle your mind, you haven’t gotten it yet or you’ve forgotten what you know.

But the main reason why Jesus is mentioning His sacrificial love here is because He wants us to do this, too! Jesus wants us to love each other as He has shown us love.

How are we doing at that? How are we doing at loving the other branches? The branches that are different from us? The branches that drive us crazy? The branches we wouldn’t relate to if they weren’t also branches?

Jesus says, “My command is this: Love each other.”

He’s talking to eleven disciples who may have hated each other’s guts if they weren’t all connected to Jesus.

Did you ever look at the backgrounds of Jesus’ disciples and how different they were from one another? We think it’s impressive when Christian Republicans and Christian Democrats can love each other in Jesus in America, but Jesus’ own inner circle had a Zealot and a Tax-Collector in it! One who colluded with the Romans and one who wanted to overthrow them.

“My command is this: Love each other.”

How are we doing at loving the other branches?

Here’s the measure: Are we sacrificing for them? Are we laying down our lives for those we say we love? Most of the time, our laying down our lives is not dying for someone like taking a literal bullet for them, jumping in front of the bus. Most of time it’s a little death, one little death at a time. It’s laying down your rights. It’s refusing to fight. It’s putting someone else’s best interests ahead of your own (Philippians 2).

Who have you recently died for?

Yesterday at their wedding, I talked to Peter and Macy about forgiving each other as Christ forgave them. That's a little bit like death each time you do it, but it's always the best way to live and to love!

Don’t wait until they deserve it to begin. Thankfully, Jesus did not wait until we deserved His love for Him to lay down His life for us. Don’t wait until that other Christians in your life have become worthy of your love before you start laying down your life for them. Because they won’t ever.

One great example of how this church family is growing in love is our Malawi Missions Team. Those 3 gave up some their limited vacation time to go over the sea and share our love with our Malawi branches. And you all gave from your own funds to send them. And you gave from your own hard-earned funds to send along with them money for food. That’s laying down your life for those you call your friends. That’s following our Lord’s example and obeying our Lord’s command. And that’s acting like Jesus’ friends.

You are my friends, so love like it. That’s the point of verse 14.

“You are my friends if you do what I command.”

Now, that sounds a little funny to our ears. Because we don’t tend to talk like that to our friends:

“You’re my buddy if you do what I say.”

But that’s not what He’s talking about. And it’s not a buddy-buddy friendship. Jesus is saying that if you do what He commands, you will show yourself to be His friend. A true friend is someone you can count on. A true friend is someone who acts like one.

We could say it this way. “You are my friends” so...

#2. LIVE LIKE IT.

Our obedience does not make us His friends, it shows that we are.

“You are my friends (and all will know it) if you do what I command.”

How wrong would it be if we said that we were the friends of Jesus, and we lived the exact opposite way that our Lord asked us to?! A true friend wants what their true friend wants. We show our friendship to Jesus by our obedience.

And that’s different from just blind obedience. That’s different from just mindless obedience. That’s the point that Jesus is making in verse 15.

“I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.”

Now, there is a sense in which, of course, we are still also His servants.

But Jesus is emphasizing here that we aren’t mindless slaves. We aren’t robots. We aren’t following Jesus’ commands just because He says so and He’s more powerful than we are.

We don’t just obey because we’re scared of being punished if we don’t. We obey because we are His friends. We obey because we love Him. We obey because He’s told us what He is up to, and we’re a part of it!

Yes, this is saying we’re on Jesus’ team!

This is mind-boggling. “I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business [They don’t know what God is up to in the world]. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.”

Jesus has told them about the mission that He was sent on.

He has told them about His special relationship with the Father. He is the "monogenays," the One and Only Begotten Son sent from the Father full of grace and truth. He has told them about the Father’s love for the big bad world and how He has sent His One and Only Son to save everyone who believes in Him. He has told them He is going away to prepare a place for them and that He’s coming back for them to take them to be with Him. He’s told them that He’s going to ask the Father to send another Counselor, the Holy Spirit to take His place.

“Everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” Jesus has taken them into His confidence. He’s disclosed Himself. He’s shown them the Father. They are not equals, but they are confidants. They have been brought into His circle. They are His friends.

And so are we. So we should live like it.

We know what Jesus wants from us. We have all of His teachings to study and put into practice. And we even know WHY we are supposed to do them. We are not mindless slaves. We are inner circle friends.

Are we acting like it?

Jesus tells His followers that they are on the inside with Him because He took the initiative to bring them there. They aren’t there because they’re so smart or because they deserve it or because they moved first. Look at verse 16.

“You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit–fruit that will last.”

And there He is back to the vine metaphor.

Jesus says that His disciples did not love Him first. He loved them first. Before they ever chose Him, He was choosing them. We saw that in chapter 1 when He started gathering His disciples. And He’s doing that today. He always makes the first move, even if we never perceive it. We love because He first loved us. He came after us to make us His friends.

And to make us His branches, bearing much fruit that will last forever.

We are His friends (because of His love), so we should live like it.

We should live lives like Jesus’ with “[L]ove, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Gal. 5:22-23 NIVO).

Last week, we said that bearing fruit meant more followers of Jesus, and it meant more followers of Jesus living like Jesus!

That’s what we’re trying to do this week with the Good News Cruise, isn’t it? We’re trying to make more followers of Jesus and live as followers of Jesus more like Jesus. That’s the main thing, right? And we always say, “The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing.”

Jesus told us, “I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit–fruit that will last.”

You are my friends so live like it.

And pray like it. V.16

“Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name.”

#3. PRAY LIKE IT.

Jesus says that when we are on mission, bearing lasting fruit, His Father will give us whatever we ask in Jesus’ name. The Father delights to answer our prayers as we pray them in the name and authority and will of His Son. Jesus has been hitting this theme over and over again in the Farewell Teachings, hasn’t He? He wants us to ask for things.

Just because He’s going away doesn’t mean that we have no access to God. We have the Spirit, and we have prayer in Jesus’ name. And the Father is listening.

I think that Jesus says this kind of thing over and over again because we are tempted to not believe it. We often don’t believe that the Father really wants us to pray or that He really will answer our prayers.

But Jesus presents a picture of a generous heavenly Father bent on giving good gifts to His people. The Father/Gardener loves to bless the branches as they reach up to Him!

One of the true marks of friendship is being able to ask for something right?

We say, “I need a favor, and I’m asking as your friend.”

This weekend, any time Peter or Macy asked their friends to do something, they just jumped right up and took care of it.

One of the most important parts of having a friend is being there for each other. Well, Jesus doesn’t need anything from us. But He asks for our obedience.

But He wants us to ask Him for stuff and His Father for stuff. And because we are His friends, we should expect answers!

Of course, truly good friends will tell you, “No,” from time to time if you are asking for something dumb or bad or at the wrong time. But the best of friends love to help their friend out.

“Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name.”

What are you asking in Jesus’ name today? I have my list. There’s something I’ve begun to ask for every single day. And I’m asking the Father through the Son in the Spirit. He hasn’t given it to me yet. But I’m asking. I’m a branch connected by faith to the True Vine, and I’m asking. I’m a friend of Jesus, and I’m asking. What are you asking for?

Pray for the Good News Cruise this week. Pray for all the details, and pray for lost souls. There are guaranteed to be lost people on our campus on Saturday, and we need to pray for them.

“I have called you friends...” so pray like it. “Take it to the Lord in prayer."

And here’s another thing to pray for. Pray for the love you need to love the other branches. Verse 17 and last.

“This is my command: Love each other.”

I think He’s serious about that. It’s not an option for the branches on the True Vine. Jesus wants His branches to love His other branches.

And mind-bogglingly, He has shown us no greater love than this at the Cross.

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