Home Improvement: Building Our Families on the Gospel

1. Home Improvement [Matthew 7:24-29]

2. Headship [Ephesians 5:22-6:4]

3. Marriage by Design [Ephesians 5:22-33]

4. Married to an Unbeliever [1 Peter 3:1-7]

5. Lovers [Song of Songs]

6. Keep Together [Matthew 19:1-9 ]

7. The Surprising Truth About Homosexuality [1 Corinthians 6:9-11]

8. The Family Dance [Ephesians 6:1-4]

9. Boys & Girls [Genesis 1:27]

10. Ready to Launch [Proverbs 1:7]

11. Worthy Widows [1 Timothy 5:3-16]

12. Single To the Glory of God [1 Corinthians 7 ]

13. Godly Grandparents [2 Timothy 1:5]

14. The Big Rocks [Matthew 6:33]

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Matt's Messages - The Big Rocks

“The Big Rocks”
December 31, 2006

This is the fourteenth and last message that I have planned in our Home Improvement sermon series on the Christian family.

It has been a good time together considering God’s blueprints for building our families on the Gospel. We’ve covered a lot of ground in the last four months.

And I wanted to end the series by talking about family priorities and commitments. And what better time of the year to talk about family priorities than New Year’s Eve, when we are looking forward to another year in which to set our family priorities and goals?

I’d like to start today with an experiment.

You may have seen this experiment done before. It didn’t come from my brain, but I think it’s a good one.

We have here, my wife’s glass candy jar. Fits a lot of candy, doesn’t it?

We’re going to try to fill this jar up. We’ll start with these. [Big Rocks]

Is this jar full?

Okay, let’s add these. [Little Rocks]

Now, is this jar full?

Okay, let’s add some sand. [Sand]

Now, is this jar full?

One more, let’s add some water. [Water]

Okay, I think we’re pretty full now. We could probably fit something else in if we squeezed it, but that looks pretty full to me.

Now, what is the point of this object lesson?

The jar is your life. It can fill up pretty fast, can’t it?

The big rocks stand for the biggest, most important things in your life.

The little rocks stand for the things that are somewhat important to you but are not the most important.

The sand stands for all of those little things that you’ve got to get done and fit into your life.

And the water is all of those pesky tiny things that fill up all the remaining spaces and make your life completely full.

Now, what is the point of this experiment?

The point is NOT that if you work hard enough you can always fit some more things into your life. “You can do it all.” NO, there is clearly a limit to what the jar can take.

Here’s the point:

How do you get the big rocks in?

Do you think if I put in the sand, water and some of the other rocks first, I could fit in the big rocks? No.

If you don’t put in the big rocks first, you’ll never find room for them!

The big rocks have to come first. Everything else is just filler.

And this is true for our families. We can’t do it all. We can’t have it all.

So, we must figure out what are the Big Rocks, and get them in first.

So here are the big rocks: Television. Right?

Watching or taping your favorite program?

It seems to be a Big Rock for many Americans. Fifty percent of American households have three or more television sets. The average American watches more than four hours of television a day. On average, children in the United States will spend more time this year in front of the TV (1,023 hours) than they will in school (900 hours, and they watch some TV there, too!). [Rosemond.com]

In almost thirteen years of marriage, my wife and I have never owned a TV. We don’t do it because we are more holy than those who own one (we aren’t!), we don’t own one because I know that I would make it a Big Rock–and I don’t have time for it.

So if it’s not TV, what are the Big Rocks?

Surfing the Internet (that one hits more home for me, a waster of my time). No?

Okay, here it is: Climbing the Career Ladder. Right?

Getting ahead at work? No. The famous saying is true: no sane person ever said on their deathbed, “I wish I had spent more time at the office.”

How about: Accumulating Money and Possessions?

A bank account, a house, a boat, a truck, a computer, a wardrobe?

Success? Getting the grade, getting the degree, getting the part, getting the sale, getting the promotion, getting popular.

Certainly that’s a Big Rock?!

Okay, let me step on some toes:

Sports and Fun. That’s what life’s all about, right?! Watching the game, getting in the game, getting out in the woods, bagging that buck, being physically fit, living for the weekend.

Now, I’m not saying that any of those things are bad. They aren’t. In fact, in their proper place, all of them are good gifts from our great God.

But they aren’t the Big Rocks, are they?

What are the big rocks?

Because whatever you determine are the Big Rocks will drive your decisions about what to do with your time, talents, and treasures.

Jesus said, “Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”

And you need to know what your Big Rocks are.

I recommend before the day is out and the new year begins that you write out a list.

A Big Rock List.

And I want to suggest four Big Rocks from the Scriptures and encourage you to put them at the top of your list and prioritize them in your life and your families’ life.

The first and Biggest Rock of Them All is JESUS CHRIST.

The Bible says that Jesus Christ is “the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy.” (Colossians 1:15-18)

Jesus Christ is supreme! He should be the Biggest Rock of Them All for you and me.

Our relationship with Him should come first and foremost.

That’s what Jesus told Martha.

Remember the story in Luke 10 when Mary was sitting at Jesus’ feet and Martha thought that the dishes needed done?

Martha complained to Jesus. But Jesus said, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. [Only one thing is supremely important–me!] Mary has chosen what is better [being with me], and it will not be taken away from her.”

Now, are the dishes important sometimes? Absolutely. Someone has to do the dishes, someone has to mow the lawn, someone has to fix the car.

But only one thing is supremely important–a love relationship with Jesus Christ.

That’s the biggest rock of all, so it needs to go in first.

When Jesus was asked what is the greatest commandment, He answered, “You shall love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength.”

A love relationship with God through Jesus Christ is the most important thing.

And the gospel of Jesus Christ is the most important message!

Paul says in 1 Corinthians 15, “I want to remind you of the gospel I preached to you, which you received and on which you have taken your stand. By this gospel you are saved, if you hold firmly to the word I preached to you. Otherwise, you have believed in vain. For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance [!]: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures...”

That’s of “first importance.” The Gospel of Jesus Christ is the Main Thing.

And the Main Thing is the Keep the Main Thing the Main Thing!


And everything else will fall into its proper place.

That’s what Jesus meant when He said, “Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things [which in the context is food, clothing, and other needs we often worry about] will be given to you as well.”

Jesus Christ is supreme.

And knowing Him in a love relationship through the gospel is the Biggest Rock of Them All.

Is Jesus your Biggest Rock?

It starts with trusting Him through the gospel.

“Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, He was buried, He was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures...”

That’s the gospel. Have you come to put your trust in it?

Today on the eve of a new year would be a great day to turn from your sinful way of life and put your trust in the Savior, receiving the forgiveness of your sins, and being born into a new life.

I invite you right now where you sit to tell Jesus that you want to be rescued by Him.

Tell Him that you believe He died for you and you want to receive Him as Lord and Savior.

And tell Him that you are trusting Him and what He did on the Cross on your behalf.

And you will begin a love relationship with Him that will last forever and ever.

And that relationship should be your first priority.

More important than eating and drinking! Man does not live by bread alone but by every word that comes for the mouth of God.

The Bible and Prayer are the two chief ways that we relate to Jesus Christ.

Listening to Him in the Bible and talking to Him in prayer.

Is Jesus your Biggest Rock?

Are you seeking first Him and His kingdom and His righteousness?

That’s the secret of contentment.

One of you wrote me a note early in this series for the Home Improvement Survey. Remember that I asked for questions that you would like to have addressed for families during the series?

And one of you wrote this beautiful set of questions, which is really a prayer. It was anonymous, and it says this:

“August 20, 2006. ‘Learn the Secret of Being Content in All Things.’

1. ... being content with the Lord’s provision - the job I have, the home I have, the car I have, the place I live, the abundance of material things I am to manage or the lack of material things to manage, etc.

2. ... being content with the storms of life as they rage through our homes. ... being content when pain and suffering becomes the Lord’s will through the loss of health, spouse, children, and loved ones. ... being content when sacrifice must take place to further the cause and will of the Lord.

3. ... being content with our relationship with the Lord as we draw near to Him when all else fails or when all the world seems to be given to us. ... being content when He is close to us and when He is silent and seemingly very far away.

To find complete contentment in who the Lord is and our personal relationship with Him ... no matter what! Learning to faithfully pass this secret on to our children and grandchildren, this is the secret I want to learn from God’s word.”

Amen!

Paul says that the secret to contentment is knowing Christ.

“I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him [Christ] who gives me strength” (Phil. 4:12-13).

If Jesus is our Biggest Rock, every else will fall into place and take it’s proper place.

And here are three other Big Rocks that I think that the Bible would point out for us.
They are all less important than the Biggest Rock and are tied directly to our relationship with Christ.

They are all aspects of the second part of the Greatest Commandment: to love your neighbors as yourself.

YOUR FAMILY, YOUR CHURCH, AND YOUR WORK & REST.

These three are sometimes in tension with one another because they are sometimes more important than others at other times. But they are all Big Rocks that need to go in first.

Let’s take them briefly in this order.

YOUR FAMILY.

We have seen how important the family is in God’s plan for last four months.

But a lot of other things can crowd it out!

So we need to remind ourselves that it is a Big Rock and prioritize our lives accordingly.

Can I suggest that you think about this order:

If you’re married, your marriage first.
If you’ve got kids at home, your children second.
And if you’ve got extended family, the rest of your family third.

Now, if your kids are grown your parents might need your more.

But while they are under your roof, they would be more important (not that you should neglect the extended family!).

The place where I see couples going wrong is in elevating the importance of their children over their marriage.

Now, hear me! I’m not saying that your children aren’t important. They are precious, and you need to do The Family Dance!

But I am saying that your marriage is supposed to be the foundation that your parenting is built upon. Kids are safest and happiest when there is lots of attention given to the marriage.

This can be overdone, too, but I don’t see that as much as I see people who take their marriage for granted and think that their children are the most important relationships that they have.

Is Family one of your Big Rocks?

YOUR CHURCH. And your ministry in your church.

Would you have put this on your list of Big Rocks?

Many people don’t.

I was out in public a few weeks ago and I ran into somebody I know who used to go to our church. And I asked this person if they are involved in church now where they are.

And the response was, “Well, I don’t really have time for that right now because...”

Is church supposed to be a Big Rock?

When Paul was writing 1 Timothy, he explained why he was writing. He said (chapter 3, verse 14) “Although I hope to come to you soon, I am writing you these instructions so that, if I am delayed, you will know how people ought to conduct themselves in God's household, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and foundation of the truth” (14-15).

That sounds pretty important to me.

The writer to the Hebrews said that church fellowship was a Big Rock. He said, “Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another–and all the more as you see the Day approaching” (10:25).

Jesus died for His church. Bought her with His own blood. I think she’s supposed to be one of our Big Rocks if we follow Him!

And I don’t just mean attending on Sunday mornings. I’m glad you’re here, but attendance and sitting there doesn’t make you a disciple. It’s only part of the picture.

Here at Lanse Free Church, we believe that everyone who is a disciple needs to follow the Lord in corporate worship, instruction, fellowship, evangelism, and service. That’s what it means to be a real part of the local church.

Anything else is less than full participation and treating it like a small rock at best and sand or water at worst.

What is your ministry here at LEFC?

Everyone has a gift, everyone should have a ministry.

Here’s where I see families have elevated other things above church, especially sports and other extracurricular activities and part-time jobs.

Some of our families here have told coaches that they will not be at practices or games that conflict with church activities. I think that’s commendable!

When Heather was a high-schooler, she told her employer that she would not be available to run the cash register on Sundays. Respectfully, she said that if they scheduled her, she wouldn’t be there, and she would lose her job if she had to, to be at church. I don’t think that’s extreme.

Now, parents, sometimes, you might have to get a job that conflicts with Sunday morning worship. I know that the world does not stop for Sundays.

But what are you doing instead? Are you at Prayer Meeting on Wednesday night?

Are you in a Link Group? Are you finding another way to meet with the People of God and fulfill your ministry? Are you getting the CDs of the messages and working through them with application to your life?

Or do you think, “Well, I have to work, don’t I?” and that’s it?!

WORK & REST are the fourth and final category that I am calling to our attention as Big Rocks in the Bible.

Work & Rest are Big Rocks because God has called all of us to do work for Him for a purpose.

Some of our work is homemaking or the activities surrounding being retired or growing up/playing/and going to school.

Most of us, it’s bread-winning work.

But all of us aren’t supposed to just be idle. We’re to find something to put our hand to, and do it with all of our might for the glory of God in the name of Jesus.

Check out Ephesians 6 and Colossians 3 to see that Your Work Matters to God.

So it’s got to be prioritized. Sometimes, yes, even above the family and the church.

Because it is part of what God has called you to, men especially.

There are times that I’d rather be at home with my family that I am in my office or out with you doing my work. That’s part of my job.

The key is to have all of the Big Rocks in the jar and none of them out. And to know that all of the Big Rocks are Big Rocks and not little ones. Then they don’t get de-prioritized away.

And notice that I say, “Work and Rest.” Rest is a biblical category, too. There was a whole commandment about it!

There is supposed to be a rhythm of work and rest worked into our lives. 1-2-3-4-5-6 REST. 1-2-3-4-5-6 REST. 1-2-3-4-5-6 REST.

I see a lot of people who try to deny that rhythm, but it doesn’t work.

Are Work & Rest Big Rocks for you?

You’ve got to put in the Big Rocks first or they’ll never fit!

Application for today?

Now, once you’ve established your Big Rock List [You may break it down differently, at one point this week, I had 7 Big Rocks, but I boiled it down to these to keep it manageable. Once you’ve established your Big Rock List...] you’ve got to start working out goals for each of those areas so that they really serve as your biggest priorities.

And what I suggest is that you set at least one goal for each Big Rock for 2007.

And you set at least one goal for each Big Rock for the next week.

A yearly goal and a weekly goal.

What might be your goals for 2007 in your relationship with Jesus Christ, your family, your church & ministry, and your work & rest?

What might be a goal you could set this week to get you closer to that big goal?

For example, maybe in the family category, you know that you need to establish some kind of a family worship time. So you need to get your family eating together or going to bed together at a time when you can have some unhurried time to study the Bible as a family.

Make that a goal and then find a time for this week and put it on the calendar.

Or maybe you might want to cut down your TV time in 2007. My friend Dan Ledford (he’s showing up a lot in these sermons these days, isn’t he?) has set a goal of reading more than he watches TV this year. And he’s created a system for tracking it and gotten some accountability partners to check up on him. (I’m one of them.)

If you don’t prioritize these rocks, you’re treating them like little rocks and something else will take their place.

Maybe you need to set a goal that has come out of this 14 week series on Home Improvement:

If you are a husband and father, it might be in the area of headship.
If you are a wife and mother, it might be in the area of submission.
It could be romance. I set out last year to increase the romance in our marriage, and it has been a wonderful year for that.
It could be working on the difficulties in your marriage–maybe the gospel if you are married to an unbeliever.
It could be parenting, the family dance.
It could be honoring parents in the family dance.
It could be raising children in biblical manhood and womanhood.
Or readying teens for launch.
Or seriously considering marriage or lifelong celibate singlehood to the glory of God.
Or grandparenting and passing on a genuine faith.

This is a good time to set some goals for your relationship with Jesus Christ (Bible reading, prayer, the other spiritual disciplines), your family, your church (get involved), and your work & rest.

And then commit these goals to God.

Because only He can truly take them and make something of them.

On our own, we will fail. In fact, you might be listening to this sermon and feeling defeated because these rocks haven’t been your Big Rocks.

But there is mercy and grace at the Cross for you. Remember, all along we have been building our families on the Gospel of God’s grace. Not on our works, our efforts, our “making-it-happen.”

But on Jesus and His grace.

He will help you. He will help you to seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness and all these others things will come to you, as well.

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Matt's Messages - Godly Grandparents

“Godly Grandparents”
December 17, 2006
2 Timothy 1:5

I want to remind you that everyone here is invited this afternoon to our Christmas Open House. Heather has been preparing for weeks on end to open our home for a great fellowship time. She has baked all kinds of goodies and boiled up some fudge to share. So, please plan to come between 4 and 8 o’clock tonight. We’re planning to have some Christmas Caroling around 6pm.

We love you, and this is our Christmas gift to you. So, please come.

For the last four months, we have been building our families on the Gospel in a series of messages entitled Home Improvement. We have talked about marriage, homosexuality, parenting, teenagers, singlehood, and widowhood among other things.

We only have a few weeks left in this series. I expect to start the Book of Numbers in the New Year.

Today, I want to talk about “Godly Grandparents.”

Sometimes, they are called Nana and Papa, sometimes Gramma and Grampa, sometimes Gram and Pap, or Noni and Popi, Oma and Opa, or Granny and Gramps.

These are those special people who are the parents of the parents.

And the grandparents of the grandkids.

We have a number of them in this room today. And many, many of the rest of us will be grandparents ourselves some day.

They are an important part of the family.

The Bible is full of grandparents. Think about all of the lists of who begat whom!

Next month, we’ll see scores of them in the Book of Numbers.

And there are precious pictures of happy grandparents in the Bible such as Gramma Naomi holding little baby Obed in her lap at the end of the Book of Ruth.

But strangely enough, there is very little instruction in the Bible on how to be a godly grandparent.

There are little hints here and there, but no major chapters on that topic.

Certainly, what we talked about two weeks ago with worthy widows would apply to many grandmas. And most of the biblical teaching on parenting would have application for grandparenting, as well.

But we have to piece together our practical theology of grandparenting from several biblical sources.

Today, our primary source is just a simple description of one Christian family in 2 Timothy chapter 1.

Paul is writing to Timothy from prison. And he is somewhat lonely and longs to see Timothy again. This is how he starts, look at verse 3.

“I thank God, whom I serve, as my forefathers did, with a clear conscience, as night and day I constantly remember you in my prayers. Recalling your tears [probably at their parting], I long to see you, so that I may be filled with joy. [What gets him by now? V.5] I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also.”

Point #1. GODLY GRANDPARENTS PASS ON A GENUINE FAITH.

Now, anybody can become a grandparent. All you have to do is to have a baby and then your baby has a baby, and that makes you a grandparent.

But not everyone is a godly grandparent.

That’s different.

And I want to argue that the main difference between being just a grandparent and being a godly grandparent is that godly grandparents (to the extent that they are able) pass on a genuine faith.

Let’s read about Timothy’s family again. Verse 5.

“I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also.”

Notice the three generations and what they have in common: a genuine faith.

The word for “sincere” here in verse 5 means “real” or “genuine.” The real deal.

This is the real deal faith in Jesus Christ.

And Gramma Lois had it (as did Momma Eunice), and she passed it down to Timothy.

Godly grandparents pass on a genuine faith.

Does that sound good?

Now, let me try to give you some practical counsel on how to do that.

Remember, this is coming from someone who has only been a parent for a few years and never been a grandparent. But I’ve seen lots of good grandparenting and experienced a good bit of it on the receiving end myself.

Letter A. You Need to Have A Genuine Faith Yourself to Pass It On.

Notice that it says, “I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois...”

Lois had a living faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.

And it was sincere or genuine.

She had trusted Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior.

She had believed the Gospel, the Good News of Jesus’ sin-bearing death and forgiveness-granting resurrection, and she had been saved.

She was the real deal.

And it takes the real deal to pass on the real deal.

Have you ever noticed that little kids can smell a fake a mile away?

If you want to have a godly influence on your grandkids, you can’t do it by faking it.

You have to be godly yourself.

You have to have a love relationship with God through Jesus Christ yourself. And that will begin your influence on your grandkids.

You will be modeling the Christian life for them. And a lot more is caught than taught.

Grandparents, do you know Jesus Christ as your own Lord and Savior?
Are you walking with Him by faith?
Are you growing in your relationship with Him?

That’s the first and most important thing.

George Burns used say that sincerity was the key to everything. If you can fake that, you can do anything.

But you can’t fake sincerity, can you?

Godly grandparents pass on a genuine faith, but they have to have one first to give it away.

If you have just been going through the motions, can I challenge you today to trust God for vibrant living faith that is the real deal?

If you don’t know Jesus as Lord and Savior, I encourage you now to submit your heart and trust your life to Him right now.

If you haven’t been growing, I challenge you to get serious about your relationship with Him. If not just for your own sake, for your grandkids.

Godly grandparents pass on a genuine faith, but they have to have one first to give it away.

Letter B: You Need to Give Your Grandkids the Best Gifts.

And I don’t mean the newest X-Box or Wii or GameCube.

I don’t mean piles of toys and clothes and money, at all.

Those are fine in moderation, but they are not the best gifts.

Here’s a list of some of the best gifts to give your grandkids:

Scripture, Time, Stories, Wisdom, and Prayer.

The best gifts are the kind of gifts that pass on a genuine faith.

How did Lois (and her daughter Eunice, who, by the way, was a spiritually single woman married to an unbeliever–which should give some of you hope of turning out a Timothy...how did Lois) pass on her genuine faith down to Tim?

Look over at chapter 3, verse 14. Paul is telling Timothy how to lead the church in Ephesus. He says, “But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it [he means himself, Eunice, and Gramma Lois], and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.”

It looks to me like Gramma Lois taught Timmy the Bible from when he was a little tike up.

That’s a great gift.

How can you give the Scriptures to your grandkids?

Some of you have a lot of time with your grandkids and they are in this room with you. Some of you don’t get to see them much at all.

What can you do to give the gift of the Scriptures to your grandkids?

And time. Invest your time in your grandkids. They need time to see how your genuine faith works itself out in your life.

And they need your love.

Give them those hugs and kisses that grandparents are famous for. I don’t care how old they are. Twenty year olds need grandparent hugs and kisses as much as 2 year olds do.

Give them your time.

And your stories.

When you’re together with them, tell them what it was like when you were a kid. Kids love stories. And they need stories.

They need to know about your life as it relates to their life.

They need a sense of personal history and rootedness. That’s a real gift to your grandkids, to let them know where they came from. It will help them to figure out where they are going.

Give them stories.

And your stories will probably have wisdom in them.

Hopefully, you have walked with the Lord for some time and you have gained some wisdom to share with your grandkids.

They won’t always want to hear it, but you should always want to give it.

Not necessarily in a lecture format. Tell a story. Share your history of how you learned a lesson and became wise. It might save them the same lesson!

I think of the godly old man who wrote Psalm 71. And the gift that he desired to give.

He said, “I will come and proclaim your mighty acts, O Sovereign LORD; I will proclaim your righteousness, yours alone. Since my youth, O God, you have taught me, and to this day I declare your marvelous deeds. Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, O God, till I declare your power to the next generation, your might to all who are to come.” (Psalm 71:16-18).

That’s the gift of wisdom–declaring God’s power to the next generation.

I know that I have profited greatly from the older men in our church family who have shared their wisdom with me–how God has worked in their lives.

I asked one of the grandpas in our church family yesterday what he would share if he was preaching this message today.

And he said that grandparenting is a chance to undo some of the mistakes made when parenting and pass along some of the wisdom that came with it.

And along with declaring God’s power to the next generation is praying for God’s power to affect the next generation.

Give your grandkids the best gift of prayer.

Pray for them.

Don’t stop. From the moment they are born until you die, have the name of your grandkids on your prayerful lips.

Many have been the children saved and grown to be Christ-following disciples because of the prayers of a godly grandparent.

This Christmas week, how about making a list and checking it twice, not of how many presents to put under little Timmy or Tina’s tree, but how you can give them the Scriptures, your time, your stories, your wisdom, and your prayers so that you pass on a genuine faith?

Letter C: You Need to Help Your Children Disciple Their Children.

The key word here is “help.”

Remember that the Bible gives the primary responsibility for discipline and instruction in the Lord into the hands of the parents. Ephesians chapter 6. We called it, The Family Dance.

Grandparents are called to help their children parent their children.

Whatever you can do to come alongside and help them is what you are supposed to do.

And that means, of course, not working around them or usurping their role with their children, or overruling them, or siding with the children over the parents or anything that doesn’t help the parents to do their job well.

I know that this is a difficult thing to navigate.

Especially when you don’t think your young son-in-law or daughter-in-law is doing a good job or you don’t understand how they are doing it–why they are doing what they are doing.

Now, I’m not saying to not give advice. I think that there is a time and a place for advice. Especially if you can do it in a loving, encouraging, helpful way!

But not in front of the kids. And not against their authority unless someone’s life is at stake.

Respect the parents and do what you can to help them disciple their kids. They are going to be held accountable for what they do with their kids. You are going to be held accountable for how you helped or didn’t help.

Sometimes, there is nothing you can do. When that happens, you just have to pray and trust.

But most of the time, there is plenty you can do to help them with that.

And I mean babysitting and everything else.

I don’t know what principles to share to really help you to grow in this area if it’s one of your weak spots, but I do recommend that you find someone who is good at it and “pick their brain” to find out what works.

I know that Heather and I have been very blessed as parents to have our parents come alongside us and work with us to disciple our children. They respect our wishes and follow our plans for them, because they know that we are responsible for our little ones the same way that they were responsible for us.

And they are always looking for ways to help us to disciple their grandkids.

I imagine Gramma Lois following Eunice’s lead in bringing up Timothy in the way that he should go. That’s probably part of how she passed on a genuine faith to Timothy.

And Letter D. You Need to Trust God with the Welfare of Your Grandkids.

I believe that a major temptation of grandparents is to worry.

To be anxious about their grandkids and what they are going to do with their lives.

Concern is good.
Prayers are better.

But worry is not.

God is faithful. And godly grandparents trust God with what He’s going to do with their grandkids.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests [about your grandkids] to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6-7).

God is faithful. Psalm 103 says, “From everlasting to everlasting the LORD's love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children's children [grandkids]–with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts.”

That doesn’t mean that all grandkids will come to faith and be saved if you will be faithful.

But it does mean to trust God with your grandkids because He is faithful.

“Cast all your anxiety [about your grandkids] on him because he cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:7)

Godly grandparents pass on a genuine faith–a trusting faith.

How are you doing in this area? Is there one of your grandkids that you need to not only pray for, but trust God with?

Your worry can’t add a second to their lives or make them a better person.

Put them in God’s hands. He can handle it.

Godly grandparents pass on a genuine faith.

It’s not automatic. You can’t force it.

But you can be the real deal yourself.
You can give them the best gifts: scripture, time, stories, wisdom, and prayer.
You can work with (and not against) their parents to disciple them.
And you can trust God them with your grandkids.

And God, in his grace, will often birth a genuine faith in them, as well.

So that you can say, “I am persuaded it now lives in you also.”

What a joy!

Point #2. GODLY GRANDPARENTS ARE WORTHY OF GENUINE HONOR.

God commands us to honor our fathers and mothers.

And that command certainly extends to our grandfathers and our grandmothers.

And when our grandparents are godly grandparents we have all the more reason to give them genuine honor.

What can you do today to show honor to your grandparents?

Next Tuesday, my brother and I are going to drive down to the Columbus area to visit my Mom’s parents. I hope to honor them with my presence and attention and prayers.

What can you do today or this Christmas season to honor your grandparents? Their memory if they have already died. Or their person if they are living?

Godly Grandparents Pass On a Genuine Faith
And they are worthy of Genuine Honor.

Can I ask all of the grandparents that are here among us to stand?

Let’s show them our appreciation.

And let’s pray for them and for us.

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Matt's Messages - Single to the Glory of God

“Single to the Glory of God”
December 10, 2006
1 Corinthians 7 & Assorted Other Places

I want to thank you for praying for me this week as I prepared this message on singleness. I didn’t expect when I began this series on the Christian family that the message on singleness would be the most difficult one to prepare! But it was.

And, to be perfectly honest, for all of the time that I have devoted to preparing this message over the last month, I still do not have it all worked out in my mind to my satisfaction. The most important chapter in the Bible on singleness is the one in front of you, 1 Corinthians chapter 7. And it is exceedingly complex and difficult to interpret, especially in harmonizing its teachings with the rest of the Bible and getting the balance of application just right.

So, instead of directly preaching 1 Corinthians 7 to you this morning, I would like to give you some pastoral counsel on singleness based on wisdom from this passage and a number of other ones.

I am speaking mainly to singles today, but everyone needs to listen.

I was jokingly asked by a few of the married men if they had to come to church today because I was preaching on singleness.

And my response, if I had been quick, should have been “You probably ought to, you don’t know when you might need it!”

And I also want to give some counsel not just to those who are single now but also to the rest of us who are called together with singles in the Body of Christ.

I am thankful that there are a lot of singles that are a part of our church family. I will not ask you to stand to pray for you because you might already feel like you stick out. But I’m glad that you are here.

I went quickly through my church directory and counted at least 30 single adults (age 18 and over) who are a regular part of our church family.

That includes the widows we talked about last week, the divorced, those who are engaged but not yet married, and those who have never been married, some who have been single for quite some time and could give us some great testimonies this morning if we had time.

Singles, I am so glad to be your pastor. And I want to give you some pastoral counsel–especially for those of you who are young and single. You are no longer a teenager who is still directly under your Mom and Dad’s care–you have “launched” in the sense of the message that I gave last month to the teens (or at least you should have launched by now into adult life). But you have not yet married. And you may be wondering if you ever will.

I’d like to pray for you and then give you three points of pastoral counsel this morning. Let’s pray.

[prayer]

The apostle Paul said in chapter 10, verse 31 of 1 Corinthians, “Whatever you do, whether eating or drinking, do it all to the glory of God.”

And I think that applies to being single.

If you are single, you need to be “Single to the Glory of God.”

“Whatever you do, whether [being married or being single], do it all to the glory of God.”

So, let me give you some pastoral counsel on how to be single to the glory of God.

#1. BE CONTENT WITH WHERE GOD HAS YOU RIGHT NOW.

There is a reason why you are single today:

God is sovereign over your life.

Many singles struggle with being single. They desire to be married.

And that desire is a good thing. The Bible says that those who get married have received a good gift.

“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD” (Proverbs 18:22).

But good desires make bad masters when they become demands.

If you think that you have to be married to be happy, you are wanting it for the wrong reasons, and you will not be satisfied.

Paul says that “godliness with contentment is great gain” (1 Timothy 6:6). He was talking there about money, but it’s true of a spouse, as well.

Godliness with contentment is great gain.

To be single for the glory of God means to be content with where God has you right now.

Some people have it in mind that you are not complete unless you get married. And that being married is a higher stage of life–especially for Christians.

There is so much talk, talk, talk about Christian marriages (like we did this Fall), and how to find a Christian mate, and so forth, but there isn’t so much talk about how to be a “Single to the Glory of God.”

So you might get the idea that singles are “second class” Christian adults.

But that idea is not biblical.

Just ask Jesus. He was single.
Just ask John the Baptist. He was single.
Just ask Jeremiah. He was single.
Or just ask Paul. And look what he says in verse 7 of 1 Corinthians 7:

“I wish that all men were as I am [single, celibate]. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.”

Now that’s a different take on it, isn’t it?

Paul wishes that everyone could be single like he is.

Single is not second-class.

In fact, there are definite Kingdom advantages to being single.

For example, what Wilma did in going up to that camp and running their kitchen.

How many married couples here could have up and moved and did that ministry like that?

Or Katie Thompson heading to China?
Or Tom Fisch going to Thailand?

Single is not second-class.

Now, Paul makes it clear in the rest of chapter 7 that married is not second class either. Both have advantages, and while Paul would prefer singleness for many people, he knows that its not for everyone. V.7

“[E]ach man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. [Not everyone is supposed to be single. Not everyone is supposed to be married.] Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am [that’s good]. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. [That’s good, too.]”

So neither is more holy, don’t listen to what some religions say about celibacy.

It isn’t more holy to be celibate!

But neither is it more holy to be married.

And whatever you are right now, be content with where God has you.

God is sovereign over your life.

You are not single by accident. You are single right now by the providential hand of your loving God.

You are not on hold.
You are not incomplete.
You are not second class.

If you are in Christ, you are right where He wants you to be.

Be content with where God has you right now.

Now, that will include putting the right emphasis on the right word.

Do you see yourself as a Christian single?
Or do you see yourself as a Christian single?

There is a big difference, isn’t there?

Don’t find your identity in your married status. [That’s true for the married, too, isn’t it?]

Find your identity in being a faith-follower of Jesus Christ.

See yourself as a Christian who happens to be single.

That will help you immensely if God never gives you a spouse. He has not promised every believer a spouse.

Someone may tell you that “God has someone out there just for you.” But that may not be true. It may be true, but it may not be true. There is no universal promise of a spouse for every believer.

But that’s okay if you are in Christ.
It may be difficult (it probably will be), but Christ is enough.

Paul said in Philippians, “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. [We could add, having a special someone or not having a special someone.] I can do everything through him who gives me strength” (4:11-13).

Christ is enough.

Now, church, married folks, let’s help our singles with this. Don’t treat our singles as second class citizens of the Kingdom God or second class members of the local church.

Include singles whenever you can in social functions.

Think about singles when you are planning ministry events.

I try to always think every week about how my message applies to the singles in our church. You may have noticed that often when I give applications, I include illustrations about living with roommates not just spouses and that sort of thing. I try not to assume that all of you are single or that sermon applies to everyone in the same way. It obviously doesn’t. About 15% of you are single adults!

And we need to remind each other that our marital status is not our identity.

We need to remind each other that we can be content in Christ–no matter what our marital status.

Be content with where God has you right now.

While at the same time...

#2. SERIOUSLY CONSIDER WHETHER GOD IS CALLING YOU TO MARRIAGE OR CELIBATE SINGLENESS.

Now, here is where it gets a little complex.

While everyone is supposed to be content with where God has them right now, not everyone is going to actually stay as they are.

God is going to call some people into marriage.

And God is going to call others into lifelong celibate singleness.

My counsel for you is to deliberately seek God’s will and calling for your life.

Don’t just fall into it. But actively seek it out to the glory of God.

The call to remain a lifelong single will probably be accompanied by a God-given ability to resist sexual temptation more easily than most.

Some scholars think that the gift Paul refers to in verse 7 is a special disposition to not feel the need for sex as much as others.

They tie it in with verse 8 and the “controlling themselves” or “burning with passion.”
Either way, if you are going to be a lifelong single, God is calling you to be a celibate lifelong single. Sex is for marriage and marriage alone.

A lot of singles are “living together” these days.

That’s wrong. Don’t do it.

Sex is for marriage. It’s that simple.

The call to remain a lifelong single may also be accompanied by a special call to a difficult ministry assignment. Some people are called to head overseas into closed countries dominated by aggressive Islam where having a spouse and a family would always be putting them at great risk.

If you have that kind of a calling, you may want to consider committing to lifelong celibate singleness.

Others of you may be called to lifelong celibate singleness because of other circumstances–such as being at fault in an unbiblical divorce such that you shouldn’t remarry or some other good reason.

And as you seek God’s will in prayer, scripture, and godly counsel, He will show you what His calling is on your life.

Again, we have some wonderful examples in our midst of godly older singles who have followed Jesus in lifelong singleness to the glory of God. If you are considering that as your call, you could learn a lot from them.

I’m guessing that most of the rest of you should be considering that God is calling you to be married or at least to pursue marriage.

Marriage is the norm even if singleness has some distinct Kingdom advantages.

And I think that there is problem in our society with directionless young men and women who are not pursuing marriage to the glory of God.

I highly recommend this book for all of the young singles in our church: With One Voice: Singleness, Dating & Marriage to the Glory of God by Alex Chediak.

He lays out a biblical framework for thinking through these issues and for looking for a spouse.

He points out that a lot of young men (especially) aren’t doing anything to become someone who is marriageable or seeking a wife.

And he calls young Christian men to stop playing their videogames and get on the stick and start moving towards marriage instead of selfishly floating around from girl to girl or fantasy to fantasy.

And in the same vein, Heather and I highly recommend this book by Carolyn McCulley: Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye? Trusting God with a Hope Deferred which, despite it’s name, is in large part about what a young single lady should be doing to put herself in the way of getting married if God would so choose.

At another time, I’ll preach a series on “biblical dating” or “courtship.” What are the principles and standards that should guide young adults as they move towards marriage? I highly recommend (and have given to several of you) Josh Harris’ Boy Meets Girl. That’s a must-read for anyone who is trying to figure out if this one is the one and how to act in the process.

And again, living-together is not the way to figure out if someone is the one.

And neither is hooking up.

And neither is making out!

If you are young and single, save making-out for marriage. It’s really just foreplay. That’s why it feels so good and is so hard to stop.

You may think that I’m crazy for saying that, but it’s true and it will save you so much grief. [But that’s another sermon!]

The main thing I want to say to you today is be deliberate in searching out God’s will for you whether it is to be marriage or celibate singleness.

Ephesians 5 says, “Be very careful, then, how you live–not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is.”

A lot of singles are going nowhere fast.

But as your pastor, I encourage you to be going somewhere even if it is slow.

Seriously Consider Whether God Is Calling You to Marriage or Celibate Singleness.

And then purse that calling to the glory of God!

For guys that are called some day to marriage, it means growing up and being a man.

And it also means becoming a man that some special lady would want for a husband.

Check out 1 Timothy 3 for a list of what a godly husband looks like. And get busy.

For young women that are called some day to marriage, it means becoming a lady that some special man would want for a wife.

Check out Proverbs 31 for a description of a lady like that. Carolyn McCully points out Proverbs 31 was an alphabetical poem written for young men probably with a description of what to look for in wife.

If you are Proverbs 31 single woman, you are putting yourself in the path of maybe becoming a Proverbs 31 wife.

But guard your heart unless and until God brings that man into your life.

Don’t give yourself over to steamy romance novels and soap opera type television, movies, and magazines. Keep your heart pure for the man God might have for you.

And guys, keep your heart and your mind (especially) pure for the woman God might have for you.

Men, don’t give in to pornography. If you have, seek help. I recommend Josh Harris’ book Sex Is Not the Problem, Lust Is for really good practical biblical advice on how to deal with your lust.

What I’m trying to say is, “Be intentional. Be deliberate. Consider what God is calling you to and pursue that with all of your might.”

That doesn’t mean that if you think you’re called to marriage that you will get married.

And it doesn’t meant that if you think that you’re called to singleness that God won’t surprise you. He is sovereign, and He hasn’t told us everything about His plans for us.

But it does mean that you live your life intentionally now.

And married people, let’s help the singles among us to do this well, too.

I’m not saying, “Let’s try to get everyone married off.” We don’t need a match-maker church.

I am saying let’s pray with our singles and for our singles for God’s will for them to be clear. And let’s give them our wisdom (when asked for!), and let’s walk with them through the process of searching out what God is calling them to.

I loved being able to help Tom and Stacey Fisch determine if God was calling them into marriage.

That was a picture of how these sorts of things should be worked out–in the context and gathered wisdom of the local church.

Heather and I got to be involved in Katie and Scott’s courtship, as well. And that was a great example of two singles to the glory of God becoming a married couple to the glory of God.

We need to work together on that sort of thing.

Seriously Consider Whether God Is Calling You to Marriage or Celibate Singleness.

And pursue that calling to the glory of God.

#3. UTILIZE THE UNIQUE ADVANTAGES OF BEING SINGLE WHILE YOU ARE.

And I’m not talking about how you can save a lot of money by living with your folks!

I’m talking about how you are free right now to serve the Lord Jesus Christ in ways that married people are not.

Look at verses 32 through 35 of 1 Corinthians chapter 7. I’m not going to explain all of the context, I just want you to see the advantages that Paul sees for Kingdom living for those who are single. Verse 32.

“I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs–how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world–how he can please his wife–and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world–how she can please her husband. I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.”

Now, Paul is not saying that being married is bad. Remember, last week, he recommended that some young widows get remarried.

But he’s also pointing out that if you can stay unmarried, it has some definite advantages–especially for focusing on the Lord and ministry.

What he calls, “undivided devotion to the Lord.”

Now, of course, a married person is supposed to have undivided devotion to the Lord, too. And even pleasing a wife or a husband is supposed to be done in a way that is devoted to the Lord and brings Him glory.

But we can all see how a single person doesn’t have the same temptation to be distracted by worldly affairs.

If you are single, you can give undivided attention to the Lord and His work.

So use that advantage while you have it!

Get busy in ministry while you can.

Don’t just concentrate on a career or an education or entertaining yourself to death!

Give yourself over to ministry. You have a lot to give!

Invest heavily in relationships with your own gender in a way that moves them along in discipleship.

Figure out what your gifts are and give them to the local church.

Bible studies, youth ministry, children’s ministry, teaching, evangelism.

You are not second-class citizens in the Kingdom God.

You are called to service in the Kingdom of God.

Undivided devotion, while you are single.

This requires creative planning and intentionality, but you can do that.

And we have some great examples in our church of single men and ladies who are ball utilizing the Kingdom advantages of singleness.

Watch what they do and get in the game!

I recommend this book by Andy Farmer, The Rich Single Life. He says that being single gives you opportunity to be rich in identity, rich in vision, rich in wisdom, rich in impact, rich in relationships, rich toward marriage, and rich in hope.

And it’s is all about snapping up those Kingdom opportunities that singleness affords.

And married people (the rest of us), let’s help the singles do that. Let’s find ways to include the singles in ministry and in ministry leadership allowing them to take advantage of this season (however long it turns out to be), to the glory of God.

Singles, be content with where God has you right now.

At the same time, seriously consider whether God is calling you to marriage or celibate singleness.

And while you are, utilize the unique advantages of being single...to the glory of God.

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Matt's Messages - Worthy Widows

“Worthy Widows”
December 3, 2006
1 Timothy 5:3-16

I had every intention of preaching a message today on the biblical teaching about singleness. In the last two weeks, I’ve done many hours of research and read several hundred pages about singleness in the Bible in preparation for that particular message. But I feel that I need still another week to get all of my thoughts together in way that will best serve you. So, please pray for me this week, as I spend another week trying to more fully prepare.

Today, instead of giving the big picture on singleness, I want to direct our attention together to a special category of singles called “widows.”

When preaching on the Christian family, marriage is justifiably front and center. And parenting is next in line. But often missed (and sometimes ignored) is the biblical importance of widows.

In Bible times, women who had lost their husbands were in a very perilous position. They did not have very many legal rights and few means of supporting themselves.

But God cares about widows! The Old Testament calls God “a father to the fatherless and a defender of widows.” (Ps. 68:5)

And so, God’s people, the church, are also supposed to care for those in need.

In fact, in Timothy’s day, the church was supposed to establish a list of those widows who belonged to the church and who were really in need–a list of those who should receive permanent care from the church–they would become “wards of the church” so-to-speak and be supported by the ministry of the church.

And in 1 Timothy 5:3-16, the Apostle Paul lays out a set of criteria for determining which widows to put on the list and which ones not to.

Let’s read it. 1 Timothy 5:3-16.

[scripture reading, prayer]

Which widows should go on the list and which ones shouldn’t? That could be a pretty difficult question to answer–and cause quite a lot of problems in the church.

Which widows should go on the list and which ones shouldn’t? One major criteria for being put on the list for permanent widow-care was genuine need. V.16 “...the church [should] help widows who are really in need.”

Those widows who had families should be taken care of by...their families (not the church).

This is important. V.4 says that children should repay their parents by taking care of them in their old age as something pleasing to God. [Robin & Drew!] V.8 says that people who don’t provide for their relatives are denying the faith and are worse than unbelievers [That’s quite a strong thing to say!]. V.16 says that if a woman can take care of a widow in her family, then she should so that the church is unburdened to help those who are in genuine need.

It is important for us to take care of those family members of ours who have genuine needs. And I think that we have some really good models of that right here in our church.

And it’s also really important that the church take care of those who don’t have anyone to take care of them. To try as hard as we can to meet their genuine needs.

Now, the second major criteria in this passage (and the one I want to spend most of our time on this morning) is genuine godliness.

The widows who were to be put on the list for permanent care were to exhibit genuine godliness.

And that’s because the list was not just to care for the widows, but to HONOR THEM. Look with me at v.3.

“Give proper recognition to those widows who are really in need.”

Proper Recognition. Or (KJV, NASB, ESV) “Honor.” Give honor to those widows.

These “list-widows” were not just in need of financial support.

They were widows worthy of honor.

If you are a widow, do you desire to be a widow worthy of honor?

If you are married, if your husband dies before you, do you desire to be a widow worthy of honor?

I think that we have a lot of women right here who want to be godly like this. And I think that our women will find a lot of encouragement and inspiration in these verses.

What’s it take to be a widow worthy of this kind of honor?

7 points this morning. Each will be brief but important.

#1. WORTHY WIDOWS HOPE IN GOD.

Look with me at v.5.

“The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God...” Stop there for a second.

The kind of woman whom the church should both care for in her old age and revere as a genuinely godly woman, puts her hope in God.

Let me ask you a question, women. What are you hoping in?

A husband? A career? A family? Your beauty? Your clothing? Your credit card?

Women who are worthy of honor hope in God. They throw themselves on God’s grace and put all their eggs in His basket.

The widows that Paul is talking about had very little choice. Left without a family to care for them, approaching old age, they had very few crutches to lean on.

They learned to put their trust, not in chariots or horses, but in the Name of the Lord our God.

Isn’t there something powerful about a woman whose hope is in God and not in themselves or in anything else?

Can you think of someone like that? Someone who puts all their faith in God’s promises?

That’s a woman worthy of honor.

She knows where to go for help. That’s point #2.

#2. WORTHY WIDOWS ASK GOD FOR HELP. V.5 again.

“The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask God for help.”

Widows Worthy of Honor Ask God for Help.

They are prayerful. They are humble. They are dependent.

Our culture does not value dependence. Women are praised these days for being in-dependent and not showing any sign of weakness.

But Paul says that widows to be put on the list for honor should exhibit dependence upon God. They don’t trust themselves and their own resources–they go to God for help.

Ladies, where do you get your help?

These widows, worthy of honor, were prayer-warriors.

I love that we have prayer-warrior widows in our church. Don’t stop that. Ever. Paul says, they pray “night and day.” That’s all the time. 24/7.

A woman like that should receive honor.

V.6 describes the opposite: “But the widow who lives for pleasure is dead even while she lives.”

This is a woman who doesn’t hope in God, doesn’t ask God for help, but instead hopes in pleasure and takes her life into her own hands. She is spiritually dead.

A woman like that should never be put on the list. Not that the church couldn’t meet some of her genuine needs–of course they should, but she shouldn’t be lifted up as an example to others.

Christian women who hope in God and ask God for help should be honored.

#3. WORTHY WIDOWS WERE ONE-MAN WOMEN.

Widows Worthy of Honor Were One-Man Women. Skip down to v.9.

“No widow may be put on the list of widows unless she is over sixty, has been faithful to her husband...” Stop there for a second.

The phrase in Greek here could be rendered, “A one-man-woman.” But the NIV has it just right in saying it means, “Faithful to her husband” (when she had one!).

Not that she could have been married only once, but that she was devoted to that one man while he lived. He was her husband. She was loyal. She didn’t even think about other men.

She wan’t infatuated with Harrison Ford or some great guy at work or a child-hood sweetheart when they came around.

Her husband was her main squeeze!

Even if he isn’t that much of a prize.

Ladies, are you a one-man woman?

If not, what do you need to change to get there?

I used to know a young lady at Moody Bible Institute who lived on the 4th floor of Smith Hall who was known as the Guy-Magnet. Her name, at the time, was Heather Joy Lundeen.

She had a different date every night of the week. And she loved all the attention she got from all of those guys.

And then one day, God got a hold of her and made her fiercely loyal to one man and one man only. And boy am I glad!

If I go first, Heather will be honored as a one-man woman.

#4. WORTHY WIDOWS ARE BUSY WITH GOOD DEEDS. V.10.

“[She] has been faithful to her husband, and is well known for her good deeds, such as bringing up children, showing hospitality, washing the feet of the saints, helping those in trouble and devoting herself to all kinds of good deeds.”

I love that last phrase: “all kinds of good deeds.” That covers a lot of things.

These widows had a reputation for ministry. Especially ministry at home.

There is no tougher job than homemaker!

Child-rearing is a strenuous good deed. And anyone who has reputation for doing it–deserves some honor in my book!

Hospitality is a good deed. Women are commended for opening their home in ministry. Is your home open for the Lord to use?

“Washing the feet of the saints” means ministering in serving capacities within the church. I think of our hard-working hospitality committee and their vital ministry to our church–don’t forget to sign-up for next Sunday’s special dinner.

“Helping those in trouble.” These women, even though they didn’t have very much, were sharing, sacrificing, caring for those who had even bigger needs!

That deserves honor.

Ladies, what kind of ministries do you have? You can see here that God honors women who serve. It doesn’t have to be up-front and leadership-oriented. It can be simple and mostly invisible, but oh, so important.

A woman who is busy with good deeds is worthy of honor.

#5. WORTHY WIDOWS LOVE JESUS CHRIST FIRST AND FOREMOST. V.11.

“As for younger widows, do not put them on such a list. For when their sensual desires overcome their dedication to Christ, they want to marry. Thus they bring judgment on themselves, because they have broken their first pledge.”

Do you see what’s happened here?

Some of the women who were under 60 (maybe much younger) had lost their husbands. But they shouldn’t be put on the list for care and honor because it wouldn’t be good for them.

Eventually, while being supported by the church, they would have lots of free time to chase after men–perhaps nonChristian men. And instead of working for their living while they had youth and strength–their hormones and desires for a husband would get the best of them and they would abandon Jesus for any man.

The KJV says, they “cast off their first faith.” That is, they don’t care what Jesus says, and what He wants for them. They chase after a man, any man.

But a woman worthy of honor loves Jesus first and foremost. What Jesus says goes. He is their first love. He is their first pledge.

Not that they can’t marry again. In fact, Paul recommends it. But they should do nothing that Jesus doesn’t want. He should come first, not their desires.

So, Ladies, is Jesus your first love?

I know that some of you desperately want a man to love you. And that is not an unnatural desire. But it must be secondary to loving Jesus! He’s got to be first.

This is another one of the things that I respect the most about my wife. She loves Jesus more than she loves me. That might intimidate some guys, but I recognize that it is the purest love for me that loves me secondly.

Women worthy of honor love Jesus first and foremost.

#6. WORTHY WIDOWS ARE CAREFUL WITH TIME, WORDS, AND REPUTATIONS.

Unfortunately, some of the women at Ephesus were not. V.13.

“Besides, they get into the habit of being idle and going about from house to house. And not only do they become idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying things they ought not to.”

These widows fell into bad habits that would preclude them from being on God’s Honor Roll.

They weren’t careful with time. Instead they became idle. They spent their days watching soap-operas and reading romance-novels! They didn’t have anything better to do but go from house to house stirring things up. Today, we’d say, “They spent all their time in chat-rooms on the Internet!”

And they weren’t careful with words. They became gossips, spilling words into people’s ears that they didn’t need to share.

And they weren’t careful with reputations. They became busybodies (what a descriptive word!), poking their noses where it doesn’t belong and then passing along the rumors.

Women like that are a problem.

We need women who make the most of their time. Who are careful with the words they use. And who treat others’ reputations as they would priceless china. And we should revere those who do.

Ladies, do you need a little work here?

Are you wasting time?
Are you interested too much in gossip?
Have you passed on too much information about someone?

God wants our women to be careful with time, words, and reputation. He loves that! He delights in women like that.

And #7. WORTHY WIDOWS GIVE SATAN NO SATISFACTION. V.14.

“So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander. Some have in fact already turned away to follow Satan.”

The church in Ephesus had women who had gone off in wrong directions. And they had brought shame and dishonor to the Christian community and the church. Some had just blatantly dropped even the pretense of Christianity and followed after Satan!

So Paul wants Timothy to encourage the women of the church to find appropriate places of ministry, industry, and usefulness, and He wants them to give Satan no room for accusations and slander in the neighborhood.

Ladies, what kind of reputation do you have in your community? Is there any room for people to talk? Do you know that it reflects back on us as a church?

There is forgiveness. There is cleansing. Don’t get me wrong. The church should be a hospital full of hurting sinners who have screwed up their lives.

But it should also be a place of much healing where we are learning to grow in godliness so that we get a reputation of being above reproach. When we sin, we ‘fess up and get it straightened out. When we mess-up, we sort it out with God and with those we’ve sinned against.

And we give Satan no satisfaction. We don’t go his way. We follow Jesus wherever he leads us.

Women who are worthy of honor give Satan no satisfaction.

I’m glad that we have godly widows in our church family.

And I pray that every woman here would be worthy of being put on the list of those to be revered.

Be a godly woman:

Hope in God.
Ask God for Help.
Be a One-Man Woman.
Get Busy With Good Deeds.
Love Jesus First and Foremost
Be Careful with Time, Words, and Reputations.
And Give Old Satan No Satisfaction!

Worship at the Lord’s Table

There is not one woman here who fully fits the example that 1 Timothy 5 puts in front of us.

No one is really worthy. Not on their own.

And there is no man here worthy of a woman like that.

Everyone here is a sinner.

That’s why we are building our families on the Gospel.

And that’s what this table is all about. Jesus Christ died to save us from our sins. To be our Rescuer. And to make us holy. To bring a measure of holiness and honorableness to each of our lives.

He asks that we repent (that means to turn) from our sins and trust in Himself and what He did on the Cross.

And for all who do, there is forgiveness and power for change.

If you are faith-follower of Jesus Christ, you are invited to eat and drink this memorial meal with this church family.

If you are not yet a faith-follower of Jesus Christ, you are not invited to eat and drink with us. Please take this time to assess your relationship with Him.

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Matt's Messages - Ready to Launch

“Ready to Launch”

November 19, 2006

It’s time again for Church Family appreciation. Heather and I have designated November as Church Family Appreciation Month. We’re still dining off of gift-cards that many of you gave us last month, and very much appreciating your love for us. So we want to love on you.

Two weeks ago, we thanked you for your expressions of love and care for our family. Last week, we thanked you for loving the lost with the Gospel. And today, I want to thank you for loving those who are different from you.

I’m not sure altogether why, but many churches that believe the Bible like we do also have a problem with loving people who aren’t like us. But this church is famous for loving people who are different from one another.

Remember when the current crop of young adults were teenagers? And the hairdos? And the friends that got brought to church? In some places, there is this idea that you have to be cleaned up and buttoned down to be acceptable at church. But this church is not like that.

My favorite moment and most proud moment in ministry this year was Craig “Tiny” Older’s memorial service back in January. We had 30 or more bikers from his bike-club. And they didn’t look or dress or act or smell like many of us normally do. And you folks didn’t miss a beat! You loved them, made them dinner, made them feel welcome, and took care of them. I was so proud of you and still am.

A few weeks ago, at a family dinner, I saw a former drug user, an ex-con, and a state trooper standing at the sink washing dishes together and having a good old time! That is a picture of what the church should be. And I love it that our church is like that. I appreciate you.

Now, let’s get into our message for today.

This Fall, in our Home Improvement Series, we’ve been learning how to build our families on the Gospel. For most of September and October, we talked about the primary family relationship–the marriage.

For the last couple of weeks, we’ve been talking about the rest of the basic family: children and parenting.

Now today, we have reached the teen years. Those magical years of growing up between being a child and being an adult.

How would you describe the goal of the teen years?

If you are a young person in your teen years, what would you say is the God-given goal for this season of your life? It won’t be long until you are past these years, you know that? I know it seems like forever, but it will pass quickly.

If you are the parent of a teen, what would you say is the God-given goal for your parenting of your son or daughter in this season of their life? You won’t have them for much longer, you know that? I know it seems like forever, but it will pass quickly.

What is the goal for these teen years?

Well, I’m sure that there are a lot of ways to answer that question, but as I was thinking about it this week, it all boiled down to this for me: “Ready to Launch.”

If you are a teenager, God wants you to use this season of your life as a preparation season for launching into Christian adulthood.

And if you are a parent of a teen, your job right now is to get your son or daughter ready to launch into adulthood.

Not just to endure the tumultuous changes.
Not just to get through school and get a diploma.
Not just to survive white-knuckled through learning to drive and waiting up for them to get home.
Not just to wait for that driver’s license, or 18th birthday, or finally getting out of the house.

But to be ready to launch into independent, Christian adulthood.

That’s the goal.

I don’t think many parents, including Christian parents, have that goal firmly fixed in front of them.

I know that most teenagers don’t have that goal firmly fixed in front of them.

Becoming adults is what being a teenager is all about.

And for Christians, it’s not just being an adult by whatever definition you supply for that, but being a fully functional Christian adult–an independent, stand on your own disciple of Jesus Christ–that’s what you are getting ready for.

Ready to Launch.

I have less than a dozen years until my daughter turns 18.

Somebody said to me this week, “Oh to keep them young forever!”

I said, “I don’t know about that.”

And I thought, “I’ve got to focus now on getting her ready to launch. I’ve only got less than a dozen years until she turns 18. And I want her to be ready to launch before that.”

And if you are a teen already, you’re much closer to launching (or at least should be!) than Robin is.

So we have to get serious about getting ready.

Well, to go along with the rocket-ship theme, I have a countdown this morning of 10 pieces of counsel for teenagers to get ready to launch.

Parents, you are invited to listen in, and I’ll try to give you some ideas, as well, for how to help your teen to get ready to launch.

This first one is absolutely foundational. #10. DECIDE (NOW) TO BE A DISCIPLE.

Teens, you’ve got to make your Christian faith your own.

God has no grandchildren–you aren’t made acceptable to God by your parents being Christians.

You have to be a Christ-follower yourself.

And to be a disciple–a Christ-follower–requires not just to put your trust in the Cross and what Jesus did there, but to–by faith–follow Jesus in every area of your life.

You have to answer the question, “Am I going to follow Jesus with my life or not?”

The biggest mistake that I have seen Christian teens fall into for the last 11 years of pastoral ministry, is not getting the Lordship question answered.

“Am I going to trust Jesus as my Savior and my Lord?” So that everything in my life is submitted to Him.

The Bible calls that “the fear of the LORD.” And it is the beginning of wisdom.

Let’s read the first seven verses in Proverbs 1. It explains the point of the book which was in many ways a training manual for young men to get them ready to launch into life. Proverbs 1:1.

“The proverbs of Solomon son of David, king of Israel: for attaining wisdom and discipline; for understanding words of insight; for acquiring a disciplined and prudent life [what adulthood should be], doing what is right and just and fair; for giving prudence to the simple, knowledge and discretion to the young [teens]– let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance [Solomon is our guidance counselor]–for understanding proverbs and parables, the sayings and riddles of the wise. The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline.]

The fear of the LORD is to understand that God is God, and you are not. And it is to reverently trust Him as the Lord of the Universe and worshipfully submit yourself to His Kingly Lordship.

And the fear of the LORD is the beginning of getting ready to launch.

Parents, the #1 question that you have to get answered is the discipleship question:

Is my son or daughter a faith-follower of Jesus Christ?
Does my son or daughter see themselves as orienting their life around the Lord Jesus?

Not just, “Did they pray a prayer back when they were 7?”
Not just, “Do they call themselves Christians?”
Not just, “Do they dutifully go to church with me?”

But “is my son or daughter following the Lord Jesus Christ by faith?”

Do they have “the fear of the Lord?”

If they don’t, they aren’t ready to launch into Christian adulthood.

This sets the course for all of the rest. If you don’t hear anything else that I say, hear me say, “You must decide now to be a disciple.”

You will be a disciple of something or other. But only Jesus is worthy of all of your devotion for all of your life.

Go wrong here, and you will go wrong, period. But if you orient your life around the Lordship of Christ, you will experience blessing.

#9. REBEL AGAINST REBELLION.

Teens and parents of teens, your relationship does not need to be typical. It doesn’t have to be full of tension and conflict. It doesn’t have to be laden with rebellion and stress and fighting.

There is no law that says that teens must go through a rebellious stage.

That’s not in the Bible.

Instead, teens and their parents can experience the joy of the Family Dance that we talked about a few weeks ago in Ephesians 6.

Remember that? Teens obeying and honoring their parents. Parents not exasperating their teens but bringing them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

If #10 is in place, and you are both submitted to the Lordship of Jesus Christ, the Family Dance can be danced with teenagers.

I’ve seen it happen.

When I was a youth pastor, there was a delightful family named the Petersons. And the Petersons had 2 teenagers at that time, and I was their youth pastor.

And the oldest, Josh, he loved his dad and mom. With a vengeance! He just lavished honor on his folks. And they loved Him. And there wasn’t any rebellion in that household.

And it was a joy to behold. Josh is a youth pastor now.

Teens, you can buck the trend as followers of Jesus Christ and rebel against rebellion.

There is a great website that I can totally recommend to the teens in our church to check out. It’s call TheRebelution.com. Notice the interesting spelling.

This website is run by two twin brothers, Alex and Brett, that are 17 years old. They are actually, Joshua Harris’ brothers, so they come from a pretty interesting family already. They lead what they call the Rebelution which is a rebellion against teenage rebellion and a revolution in teens becoming mature Christ-followers.

They have tons of great stuff they’ve written and links to other rebelutionaries.

Alex writes, this website, “challenges you to throw off the shackles of what society expects of you. The teen years are not a vacation from responsibility. They are the training ground of future leaders who dare to be responsible now.”

Parents, do you believe that your relationship with your teen does not have to be typical? It doesn’t have to be a war between you and them?

I highly recommend Paul Tripp’s book about parenting teens. It’s called Age of Opportunity. This is a season of getting them ready to launch. If you are both disciples, it doesn’t have to be a warzone.

Rebel Against Rebellion.

Teens, honor your Mom and Dad.

Let me tell you a secret. Don’t listen, Mom and Dad. If you consistently honor and obey your Mom and Dad, you will get more and more freedom until you won’t know what do with all the freedom you get!

If you consistently honor and obey your Mom and Dad, you will get more and more freedom until you launch out on your own.

Rebel Against Rebellion.

#8. FIND YOUR ID IN CHRIST.

Find your identity in Christ.

One of the major struggles that I see teens go through is the identity crisis.

“Who am I?” “Why am I here?” “What does it mean to be me?”

Are you struggling with that question?

I did when I was a teen. I went through several different phases, some of them at the same time:

I was the happy to be a geek guy. I actually wore a pocket-protector to high school! For fun! For kicks!

I was also the band-guy. I was in symphonic band, concert, jazz band, choir, barbershop quintet, and marching band. I was the drum major for the marching band!

I was also a goody-two-shoes.

And I went through a black-trenchcoat phase.

And I did the going to dances and trying to get girlfriends thing for awhile.

On our vacation, I subjected my wife to going through one of my highschool yearbooks. And on every other page, I was reinventing myself. Who was I?

Here’s how to figure out who you are. Start with #10. I am a disciple of Jesus Christ.

And figure out what that means for every area of your life.

Start in and move out. The Bible uses this phrase “in Christ” at least 85 times to describe who you are if you are a disciple.

Get familiar with who God says you are, and you’ll figure out your ID really quickly.

Parents, you can help a lot here, not just by listening to what they are saying about who they are (and that’s big, do that!), but also by sharing what the Bible says about who they are in Christ.

#7. DON’T ♥ THE WORLD.

Now, I don’t mean don’t love the world like John 3:16, like God loves the world. We are to love people in the world with the love of Christ.

But I mean don’t love the world like 1 John 2:15 which says this, “Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For everything in the world–the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does–comes not from the Father but from the world.”

That sounds a lot like popular culture to me.

The cravings of sinful man (TV commercials), the lust of his eyes (MTV and VH1), and the boasting of what he has and does (what everyone says about themselves on MySpace).

Do not love the world.

Worldliness is adopting the values of the unbelieving culture around us. And it is very hard to fight.

And it is especially hard if you are absorbing the media without discernment.

What are you watching?
What are you listening to?
What are you playing?

What DVDs, mp3s, CDs, and video games are you taking in?

Those things are shaping your mind and heart in significant ways.

And the amount of the world that you take in will affect whether or not you are ready to launch.

Parents, you need to be monitoring and, when necessary, protecting your teen from the pervasive forces of the world that are trying to get into their mind and heart.

For example, this is your choice (not in the Bible), but I think it is utter folly for a teen to have a television in their own room–unless you think that they are almost ready to launch.

It’s like inviting the world into your teen’s bedroom. “Here, have him!”

But, protecting isn’t good enough, is it?

That doesn’t get them ready to launch!

You’ve got to teach and train them how to navigate pop culture and the media and use biblical principles to discern it.

You can’t just protect. You’ve got to help them know how to navigate it themselves.

I know that this strikes a chord with most teens. “Hands off my music!”

Teens, ask yourself this question. Does my Lord want me to be listening to this?

Am I loving Jesus by listening to, watching, or playing with this?
Or am I loving the world?

Countdown #6. SAVE SEX (ALL OF IT) FOR MARRIAGE.

This one doesn’t surprise anyone. Teens have hormones.

Listen, sex is for adulthood and marriage.

Sex is really good. Remember my sermon on Song of Songs that you giggled your way through a month ago? Sex is really good.

God came up with sex. Think about that for a while. Sex is God’s good idea. I’m really glad He came up with it.

But sex is for marriage like fire is for a fireplace. In the fireplace, fire is great and hot and delightful.

But a fire in the middle of the living room is destructive.

Save your fire for your fireplace.

Hebrews 13:4 “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.”

I know that the world and your friends all send very different messages on this one.

But God sends a very clear message. And you are a disciple.

Save sex (all of it, I know that a lot of kids are doing everything but intercourse and don’t think that it is really sex because you can’t get pregnant, but it is sex—and save it all) for marriage. You will be glad and your spouse will be glad.

I pray at least weekly for Robin’s husband. And one of the things I pray is that he will have kept himself pure for her.

Parents, I don’t have to tell you that it’s your responsibility to protect them and train them in this area.

I know that a lot of parents out there, leave it up to the school or the culture, though. We must be vigilant. And if we have to be, we must be unpopular with our children, sex is a powerful force that can’t be played with.

Teens, sex is for marriage. If you aren’t ready for marriage, you aren’t ready for sex. It’s that simple. Not easy, but simple.

#5. SEEK WISDOM.

It’s easy when you are young to think that you know it all. But that is the mark of foolishness. Wise youth seek out wisdom from wise adults.

The first few chapters of Proverbs have this as the theme: “Get wisdom.”

Listen to Proverbs 4:5

“Get wisdom, get understanding; do not forget my words or swerve from them. Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you. Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding. Esteem her, and she will exalt you; embrace her, and she will honor you. She will set a garland of grace on your head and present you with a crown of splendor.”

Man, that sounds good, doesn’t it?

I want that for our teens. May we have the wisest teens in the area.

To do that, it involves humbling yourself.

It take admitting you don’t have all the answers.

But “esteem [wisdom], and she will exalt you; embrace [wisdom], and she will honor you. She will set a garland of grace on your head and present you with a crown of splendor.”

Now, wisdom can be defined as the art of applying truth.

So, it’s not just Bible knowledge (but you have to get that!), and it’s not just a biblical worldview (but you need that, too), and it’s not just devotional reading (but you should develop a habit of Bible reading and prayer), it’s the ability to apply what you are learning to your every day life–that’s what you’ve got to do. Connect truth with life.

I try to provide you with a healthy dose of wisdom every Sunday.

What are you doing with that every week? Do you listen? Do you apply?

Get wisdom.

Parents, you need to be wise to get your child ready to launch. Are you getting wisdom?

Often, we, as parents, want to spout our wisdom. But we need to make sure that we are also humbling ourselves and learning and applying–not just spouting.

Seek wisdom.

Countdown #4. BE CAREFUL ABOUT YOUR COMPANIONS.

1 Corinthians 15:33 says, “Do not be misled: "Bad company corrupts good character.”

Who are your friends? Who is influencing you?

I can hear you now, “Houston, we have a problem. Pastor Matt is meddling with my friends.”

You need to make your choices about friends based on your disciple relationship with
Jesus Christ.

Would Jesus have you be the kind of friend you are with the kind of friends you have?

Now, I’m not saying that you don’t act as some kind of a friend to various people.

But what kind of a friendship are you developing?

Let me ask it this way. Whom is influencing whom?

And what kind of an influence are they?

If you are tuning me out because I’m saying this, are you (Proverbs 1:7), “despising wisdom and discipline?”

Parents, you need to be monitoring the friendships that your teen has and helping them to think through them biblically.

When they are younger, you can choose their friends for them to some degree. As they get older, you have to help them to choose them wisely. Because friends are big influence.

This is where I need to say something about MySpace and Xanga and Blogger and other relational networking websites.

I’ve seen a number of our young people have MySpace pages or Xanga pages. And they are very revealing of what is going on in the mind and heart and relationships of our teens. I’ve read a number of them. Many of them are public. They are broadcasting their relationships and interactions on the web.

Parents, you should be reading your teens’ web journaling activity–especially as it relates to your kids’ friends.

Getting to the end. #3. DO HARD THINGS.

I get this from the Harris twins and their “rebelution.”

They point out that teens can do a lot more than society thinks of them.

Teens can take responsibility, can work hard, can achieve amazing things when they put their mind to it.

And that is great training for being an adult.

Get a job. Create a business. Organize a youth outing. Don’t be passive or lazy, instead, lead. Act. Do hard things.

The opposite is something the Harris twins call “adultescence,” which is the Peter Pan Syndrome. “I’ll never grow up.” 27 year olds living with Mom and Dad never going anywhere. They call them "kidults."

There was a movie about that this year. What was it called? “Failure to Launch.”

Do hard things.

All of the teens in the Bible did.

Name some famous teens in the Bible.

We don’t know exactly how old they all were, but I’m guessing at least these:

David the Shepherd who killed a lion and a bear before he killed a giant.

Daniel the Prophet who stood up to the King of the Superpower of the World and looked lions in the mouth.

Esther who approached the King without being summoned.

And Mary who bore the Christ child and all of the scorn of her community.

They did hard things. You can to.

Parents, what hard things can you call your child to?

That will get them ready to launch.

Countdown #2. BE A MISSIONARY–RIGHT NOW!

You don’t have to wait until you grow up to share the gospel with your community.

On Wednesday nights, I meet with a group of 5 young men for Bible study, prayer, memorization, and discipleship.

And one of them, when we took prayer requests this week, said, “Let’s pray that we are ready to share the Gospel when we need to.”

I was totally impressed. That’s being a missionary right now.

Some of you may be called to be a missionary overseas someday. You know who goes there? The ones who have a proven track record here.

Your schools are full of lost people who need the Gospel. Are you going to stand up for Jesus and share Him with them?

I was totally encouraged last week when we had so many teens show up with rakes and smiles to serve in our leaf raking OUTReach Sunday afternoon.

Colossians 4 is talking to you when it says, “Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.”

I can’t wait to do a baptism for someone you teens have led to Christ. If you do that, they will be eternally grateful! And you will be ready to launch.

Countdown #1. BELIEVE THE GOSPEL.

You might have wondered how I was going to get it in there.

Not only do we need to believe the gospel (#10) to become disciples at the beginning of the Christian race, but we need to believe the Gospel every day all day.

It’s not just the way we start the Christian life, it’s the way we live the Christian life.

Parents, you need to keep the Gospel front and center in your parenting. Parent towards the heart–not just behavior. Don’t be a legalist parent. Be an evangelist parent.

Parents, you need to keep the gospel in front of you. Because you are a sinner in need of a Savior, too.

Your parenting will be flawed. But we have a mighty, mighty Savior to redeem our parenting and give us grace to go on.

And we need to hold out the gospel to our teens.

And teens, you need to know the gospel inside and out. Not just to share it, but to live off of it.

I recommend reading C.J. Mahaney’s “Living the Cross-Centered Life.” Again, if you already have!

Like Paul, I want to “remind you of the gospel...which you have received and on which you have taken your stand...” It is of “first importance” (1 Corinthians 15:1-3).

And when you have internalized the Gospel, you are ready to launch.

“Houston, we have lift-off!”

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